Three Years
by smc-27
Summary: Lucas left her in L.A. after proposing, but never got over Peyton. Now she's engaged to someone else and coming home to Tree Hill to get married. Does the new guy stand a chance? Leyton
1. Chapter 1

It had been three years. Three years since he'd last seen her. Three years since he walked away from her. Three years since he asked her to marry him. Three years since he was really, truly happy. Three years, and every day, she was still the first thing he thought of when he woke up.

He never admitted to anyone else, but somewhere in those three years, he had realized that leaving her had been the biggest mistake of his life.

Now here he was, three years later, trying to find inspiration for his next novel. His first book had been a success, but now he was blocked, and searching for something to write about. Anything at all. Any story he could complete. But he was at a loss. There were no words. He had nothing to say. He couldn't do it. He just lived his life, alone, save for family and friends. He coached his team and went home to his empty house.

He missed her, though he'd never admit it to anyone. He'd had a hard enough time admitting it to himself. On some level, he knew that his friends knew, but none of them could find the words to talk to him about it. Haley, Nathan, and Brooke all spoke to her often, but they knew better than to keep him up to date. They knew he was in no position to hear about her.

So many times, he'd picked up the phone, wanting to dial her number and hear her voice on the line. But too much time had passed. There had been too much space and distance between them, and he couldn't change that now.

He imagined what her life was like. Was she still full of life and determination? Was she still as stubborn has she'd always been? Did she still use her art and music to express her feelings? Herself? What kind of clothes did she wear? Did she wear the same perfume? Did her hair still smell like coconut? Did her skin still taste the same?...

All day, every day, his mind was full of Peyton, and being away from her and without her was torture. Lucas woke up every day and rolled to his side, reaching out for someone who wasn't there. She was never there.

This particular day, a Sunday, he drifted back to sleep. His subconscious took him back to that hotel room in L.A.

_"You're saying no." He was defeated. His already damaged heart was taking a beating on this one._

_"No. I am not saying, no. I'm saying not now. I want to marry you someday." The tears were pooling, making her green eyes sparkle even more than usual. She reached for his arm, but he pulled away out of anger or hurt, or both. _

_"Hey, don't do that," she pleaded. "Don't pull away from me, okay. I want us to be together. I love you so much."_

_"Just not enough." He looked down at his hands, terrified of the reality he was facing. _

_"Okay. Can we take this back? Can we just pretend like you never woke up? Please?" He watched as a tear fell down her cheek. _

_"I don't think that we can," he said. _

_"I'm afraid that this conversation is going to end with…"_

_"Goodbye," he interrupted, finishing her thought._

_He left her sleeping, convinced that she didn't believe in them or in him. He was too heartbroken to have to speak to her, so he left. They were supposed to be together, but it was clear that wasn't what she wanted. So he left with nothing more than a kiss to her sleeping temple._

Lucas bolted upright in his bed. The same dream that had haunted him for three years. The day he wished he could take back. He raised his hands to his face, wiping beads of sweat from his forehead, and sighed heavily. It was a nightmare, but it had also happened. He wished so badly that he could go back to that hotel room and shake the boy in it. Shake him and tell him to stop letting his ego get in the way of his heart.

She hadn't said no.

--

After Lucas left her in that hotel room, Peyton fell apart. She took time off work and didn't leave her apartment for a week. She didn't take calls from anyone. Not even Brooke and Haley, who'd both called every day after they found out. She knew they'd heard from Lucas what had happened, and she just couldn't talk about it. It's not that she simply didn't want to, she physically couldn't do it. Talking about it would make it real. Other people knowing about it would make it real. All she'd wanted since she was 16 was Lucas, and she didn't want to admit that it was finally over. One of the worst moments in her entire life was waking up to find him gone.

Every day got a little easier. After she realized and admitted to herself that they were finally over, life became a bit simpler. It took her a long time to remember how to exist without him, but between work and the few close friends she'd made in L.A., she managed. Work got busier, too. She was promoted into a marketing position, which she loved and excelled at. She felt a sense of relief- that was what she'd wanted to do since she arrived in the city, and now she was doing it.

She talked to Haley and Brooke often, but never dared to ask how he was. She still wasn't over him, and it would have killed her to hear that he was seeing someone new, although she didn't doubt that he was. He was a published author now. She'd bought his book, but hadn't even opened the cover. The words it held now felt like a lie. He wouldn't love her forever. He didn't.

Walking past a large bookstore one day, she was frozen in her tracks by a photo of him in the window. He was going to be in town for a signing the following week. The photo must have been a recent one - he looked more grown up, more hardened. He wore a suit and tie and his icy blue eyes all but jumped off the page. She made a note of the day, and waited the entire week for him to call. She thought he would invite her - that he would want her there to share this with. She waited. Every day. The morning of the signing, she finally cried over him again. It had been a year since she'd shed a tear over him. It really was over.

She pulled herself together and went out with her friends that night. After one too many drinks, she met a man named Evan. He was tall and handsome, with deep brown eyes and brown hair. He was far from what Lucas was. He wasn't into sports. He was a lawyer in the entertainment industry, representing all sorts of celebrities and athletes. As he put it, he read contracts and wrote up pre-nups day in and day out. He was the opposite of her ex-boyfriend, and that made him perfect to her that evening.

They began spending a lot of their time together. Almost all their time together. It was refreshing to be with him, and he treated her like a queen. She never doubted that he loved her - not once since the first time he'd said it. He bought her flowers all the time - roses, which weren't her favourite, but she didn't have the heart to tell him. He was sweet and caring, and she was lucky to have him. It was easy and comfortable and they had very few issues or arguments.

After about a year together, she moved into his house at the beach, where she had her own office set up, which, let's face it, was more of a sanctuary than it was an office. Sure, her computer was in there, but it was filled wall to wall with albums and she spent a lot of time in that room, just existing quietly with the music that surrounded her. He never fully understood her need to be alone so much, but he didn't press the issue. He didn't press any issues. He was just happy to have her.

One night after dinner, she and Evan stood on the deck of their home, his arms around her and two glasses of wine on a table nearby, watching the sunset. Somewhere between the pink sky and the waves crashing on the shore, he whispered in her ear.

"Marry me."

He didn't pose it like a question. There was no long, drawn out speech. There was no sentimental throwback to the first time they met.

She turned her head to look at him. "What?"

"Marry me, Peyton," he repeated.

She smiled brightly, and he mimicked the gesture. "OK." She spun herself around so they were locked in an embrace, then he disappeared into the house, returning with a pale blue box in his hand. He opened it and pulled out a beautiful princess cut solitaire diamond in a platinum setting. He slid the ring on her finger and hugged her again.

She was happy, truly, but for some reason, feeling this ring on her hand, she wondered what the other one looked like. The one Lucas had wanted her to have. then her thoughts went to something else. Or rather, some_one_ else...

Lucas.

--

Brooke woke from her sleep and stretched happily. Since returning to Tree Hill, she'd slept better than she had since...well, since she left the town in the first place. There were no sirens, there were no audible arguments floating through her window from the street. There was no light from adjacent high rises trickling into her bedroom. There was a darkness and silence that she'd been searching for for the past four years.

Since her return, she'd fallen back into her friendships as though she'd never left. The old gang was back in Tree Hill. Well, all but one person.

She was making coffee when the phone rang.

"Hello?" she spoke groggily, turning on her coffee machine.

"Brooke, it's Peyton."

"Hey buddy, what's up?" she said, suppressing a yawn.

"I have news," Peyton said, pausing for dramatic effect. "Evan and I got engaged last night!"

Brooke dropped the coffee mug she'd pulled from the cupboard, and it broke on the counter in front of her.

"Brooke? Are you OK?" Peyton asked.

"I'm fine! Oh my God, tell me everything!"

Brooke listened as Peyton gave the details of the simple proposal, and what Brooke was more interested in - the ring.

"We want to get married in Tree Hill," she stated.

"What? Why?" Brooke asked. Suddenly, all she could think of was Lucas and his poor broken heart. There was no way he wouldn't find out.

"Well, Evan's an only child and neither of his parents are alive. We just want something small, and so he suggested we do it in Tree Hill," Peyton explained.

"Wow," Brooke said. "So when is it going to be?"

"We're flying out there next week and staying till the wedding." She paused on the other end of the line. "Which will be in 6 weeks."

"6 weeks!? Jeez Peyton, why so fast?" Brooke was afraid she sounded like she wasn't being supportive, but 6 weeks was really soon.

"Why not? We just want to be married." Peyton had actually asked Evan if they could get married right away. His reaction had been similar to Brooke's, but he wanted to please her, so he agreed.

"What about work?" Brooke asked.

"Technology! I can do my job from Tree Hill," she explained. "Listen, I have to call Haley, but I'll talk to you soon, OK?"

"OK. Congrats, Peyton."

The two hung up, and Brooke couldn't help but feel less than thrilled for her friend. But why? She should be ecstatic that her best friend found someone to spend the rest of her life with. But Brooke couldn't shake the feeling that Peyton had already found that person, and that that person was going to head in a downward spiral when he found out she was marrying someone else...

Brooke was cleaning the shards of glass that had scattered around her kitchen, when her phone rang again.

"Hey Haley," she answered, after seeing _'Naley'_' flash across her call display.

"Hi," Haley said worriedly.

"I take it you've talked to Peyton," Brooke said, as she sat on a stool in her kitchen.

"Yeah, I just got off the phone with her." Haley breathed deeply. "I'm worried about..."

"Lucas," Brooke interrupted. "Yeah."

"Yeah," Haley said.

"What does Nathan think?" Brooke asked.

"Nathan thinks that his brother is going to need our help with this one. Nathan also thinks that we maybe should have told Luke that she was dating someone," Haley said.

"OK, but how do you do that? 'Hey, Luke, you know the girl you're still in love with? She's over it'?"

"I know," Haley paused. "So what do we do now?"

"We let Nathan handle it," Brooke joked.

"Brooke!" Haley shouted.

"I don't know, Hales. I really don't."

Haley sat in her kitchen after she got off the phone with Brooke. Nathan could see she was worried, so he walked over and sat next to her, putting an arm around her shoulder.

"What are you thinking?" he asked.

"I'm thinking that maybe we can talk to Lucas' editor, Lindsey or whatever her name is, and have her tell him she needs him in New York for the next 6 weeks." She looked over at her husband.

"Hales, we have to tell Lucas," he said.

"Tell me what?" Lucas asked, walking into the kitchen nonchalantly.


	2. Chapter 2

_"Hales, we have to tell Lucas," he said. _

_"Tell me what?" Lucas asked, walking into the kitchen nonchalantly. _

"Oh! Hey Luke. I have to go get dressed!" Haley shouted, jumping from her seat.

"Haley James Scott," Nathan said, grabbing her arm. She turned to look at him and sighed.

"What's going on, guys. You haven't acted this weird since you told me you got married," Lucas said, pouring a cup of coffee for himself.

Nathan and Haley exchanged a glance at the mention of the word _married_.

"OK, Lucas, sit down." Haley gestured for him to take a seat at the table, which he did. "Nathan?" she said.

"Luke, don't get mad," Nathan started. "We have to tell you something."

"I hate stories that start like this," Lucas said, fidgeting with the mug in front of him.

"Peyton called here this morning," Nathan said. Lucas jerked his head up to meet Nathan's eyes at the mention of her name.

"She's um..." Haley started, "She's engaged."

Lucas felt his stomach drop. He felt like he was going to be sick. Engaged? To be married?

"She uh...She's engaged?" he asked somberly.

"I'm sorry, man," Nathan offered.

"How?" his temper flared and he raised his voice. "Who is this guy? How long has she been with him?"

"Almost two years," Haley said softly. It killed her to see her best friend hurting like this.

"Two years?!" he shouted, standing from his chair. "You didn't think to tell me?"

"I'm sorry," Haley offered. "We just didn't know how to."

"Great, Haley. Thanks for sparing me the pain," he said. His tone was laced with anger and sarcasm.

"There's something else," Nathan said, standing so his eyes were level with his brother's. "The wedding is going to be here."

Haley looked at her hands on the table in front of her, afraid of what look might be in Lucas' eyes.

"Here?" he repeated.

"Yeah," Nathan said, reaching out to grab his brother's shoulder.

"When?" Lucas asked, looking at Haley.

"6 weeks," she stated.

Lucas just let out a breathy chuckle and shook his head at both of them before walking out of their house and slamming the door behind him. They heard the tires of his car squeal as he took off down the street. Nathan and Haley exchanged a worried look.

Lucas drove the back roads of the town for an hour, just searching for answers in the solitude. He found none. How could they have all kept this secret from him? On some weird level they probably thought they were protecting him and his already broken heart, but they had to know that he'd find out sooner or later. He felt betrayed and angry and sad and just _alone_. He'd always thought that someday, some how, she'd come back to him. But now she was marrying someone else. It was over. There was a finality to the thought that made him want to scream and cry at the same time.

He drove back into the town and stopped at the liquor store. He needed something to numb the pain, and whiskey always seemed to do that pretty easily.

Brooke saw him walk out of the store with a bottle in his hand, and was immediately even more worried than she had been. She knew Lucas. She knew that he would try to bury his feelings before hitting the edge, when they'd come pouring out of him. She would give him the day to try to kill the pain, then tomorrow she'd check in on him. It was summer, so he didn't have work, which in this case was a bad thing. He had no reason to leave his house unless someone made him.

--

Brooke gently tapped on the door to his bedroom the next morning. She knew he'd either be asleep or hung over. She pushed the door open, to see him laying shirtless in his bed, sleeping. She looked around the room, and immediately knew what he'd done the night before. He'd surrounded himself with all things Peyton while he drank to numb himself. There were drawings and photos and letters, and his novel.

She started to tidy up, not wanting him to wake up and see the blonde's face staring back at him from a photograph. Just as she'd put away the last of it when he stirred.

"Brooke?" he said groggily.

"Hey Luke." Her voice was soft and she sat next to him on the bed. "How you feeling?"

"Like I got really drunk last night," he replied, raising his arm to his head.

"Yeah," she said, wincing slightly.

"And like I got my heart torn out and I'm pissed at my friends."

"Luke, you can't do that," she said. "You can't blame us for not telling you."

"How do you figure?" he asked. He sat up too quickly and was forced to lay back down.

"Truth?" she asked.

"Truth."

"Honestly, I didn't think it would last - her and this guy." He narrowed his eyes as she spoke. "But she's happy, Lucas. You have to let her go and let yourself be happy, too."

"I was happy. And I walked away from it. So I deserve the misery," he said, rolling away from her.

"Luke..."

"You can go, Brooke."

His statement caught her off guard and she stood to leave. Her hand was on the doorknob, ready to pull the door shut when she turned to him again and spoke to his back.

"You have to let her go, Lucas."

He closed his eyes, wanting to sleep off the headache he had. He should have known he'd have the dream again...

When he awoke, he went to his kitchen and reached for the bottle that had helped him through the previous evening.

That entire week, he drank away his fear and loneliness, only leaving his house when he ran out of alcohol. His friends were concerned, to say the least, but anyone who'd attempted to talk to him was spoken to harshly and told to leave him alone. Nathan had realized that no one told him when she was coming to town, but they all figured it was best not to bring it up again.

Come Sunday, Lucas realized that he wasn't feeling any better, and being perpetually hung over was no way to get through it. He spent the day cleaning his house and reading and trying to avoid thoughts of the blonde woman he'd been in love with since he could remember. He went to sleep that night on clean sheets with a clear head. Maybe Brooke was right. Maybe he did have to let her go. He just didn't want to.

He awoke at 2:00 a.m after dreaming of her green eyes again, and decided he needed to get out of the house he'd stayed in for the past week. There was only one place he'd ever think to go, and he decided to walk. He pulled on a pair of jeans and a tee shirt and grabbed his basketball from its place next to the door and started walking towards the only constant in his life - the River Court.

He bounced the ball as he walked the empty streets along the route he could take in his sleep. When he got to the court, he noticed someone standing in the centre of the court, staring down at the pavement. He tried to make out who the person was through the darkness. Anyone who knew about this court knew where the lights were. He bounced the ball out of habit. She turned at the sound of the rubber hitting the pavement, and her eyes widened when she saw him.

"Lucas," she whispered.

He stopped dead in his tracks and stared at her. Her hair was longer than he remembered, and less blonde than it had been the last time he saw her. She was in a short sleeveless summer dress and a pair of brown leather flip flops. He felt like his heart stopped when he noticed it was her. He wondered if he was still in that dream.

"Hi," she said softly, taking a step towards him.

She noticed his features had become even more masculine since she last saw him. He had a bit of stubble on his jaw line and his body was still as toned as ever, she noticed beneath his tee shirt. She watched as he spun the ball in his hands.

"What are you doing here?" he asked, maybe a little too harshly.

"I'm, um, back for a little bit," she said, looking back down at the court. She crossed her arms and hid her left hand, for reasons she couldn't explain.

"I heard you're getting married here," he said abruptly.

"Yeah," she replied softly. There was an awkward silence that neither of them could stand. "Still come here when you can't sleep?" she asked.

"Yeah," he said. "Had a bad dream."

"Well, I'll leave you to it. I should get back to..." she said, her voice trailing.

"Where are you staying?" he asked.

"We're staying at my dad's," she explained.

"We?"

"Um, yeah," she said nervously. Why was she nervous? She didn't even want to mention her fiancées name. He didn't respond, he just looked at her. He didn't know what to say. _She_ was now a _we_. She would always be a _we_ from now on. And not with him. "I'm gonna go," she said, turning to walk away from him.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he asked suddenly.

"Tell you what?" She turned back to face him again. He had walked closer to her, and now they were only a couple feet apart.

"About him." He looked down to his feet and waited for her answer.

"Phone works both ways, Luke," she said simply, then turned and walked away from him.

Of all the things that could have happened to him that night, that might have been the worst. There was a part of him that hadn't believed this was really happening, but now there was no doubt. She was getting married.

He didn't know how long she'd be in town for, but he knew that he actually, strangely, liked seeing her. Even if she was someone else's, there was a part of him that felt...relieved...that she was back in Tree Hill. She was home.

--

"Hey, Luke! You sober yet?!" Nathan shouted, entering through the front door of Lucas' house.

"Ha, ha," Lucas said sarcastically.

"Wow! And showered? What's the occasion?" Nathan asked, grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge and sitting at the kitchen table.

"The answers aren't in the bottom of a bottle, little brother," Lucas said, joining Nathan at the table.

"No, they aren't." The two of them sat in silence for a few minutes, trying to decide whether or not to tell his brother about seeing Peyton the night before.

"So, I figured I'd tell you that she's here," Nathan said. He didn't need to specify who 'she' was.

"I know," Lucas said, noticing the confusion on his brother's face. "I saw her last night - well, this morning - at the River Court."

"Oh. And?" Nathan asked.

"She looks good," Lucas said, taking a sip of water. Nathan just smiled weakly.

"Look, Brooke and Haley have to be there for Peyton, and so do I, but if you need to talk, you know Haley and I are always here."

"Thanks," Lucas said, with a slight nod. "I think I'll be fine."

"Really?" Nathan asked.

"Yeah." He paused to look at his hands. "I'm going to get her back."

Nathan didn't know what to say. He didn't want his brother to get hurt - again - but he couldn't help but notice the denial. She was engaged to another man and planning a wedding. How could he possibly think that he'd get her back?

--

"Morning, sweetie." He said into her ear as she lay on her back in bed in the room she grew up in.

"Morning," she said, not looking at him. He obviously didn't know she'd left during the night. She was prone to waking up in the middle of the night, and he'd never questioned her about it. He was a deep sleeper, and he never noticed when she left. Part of her loved it, but part of her wanted him to ask so she could talk about it. But she didn't bring it up because she knew it would worry him.

They'd gotten in late the night before, and gone straight to bed when they arrived at the house. Now, as he stood up out of her bed, he noticed her room. Really noticed it. It had been left exactly as it was when she left for L.A. The walls were red and albums lined the wall closest to the door. She noticed a few photographs still in their frames - the basketball team from their State Championship win, Brooke and her clutching each other at some party, the entire group in Honey Grove, Lucas with his arms around her and her gazing into her eyes. She missed them. She missed him.

"I still can't believe you were a cheerleader," he said, picking up a photo of her, Haley and Brooke in their cheerleading uniforms.

"That was a long time ago," she said, taking the photo from him and smiling at the memory. It was taken during the Classic, just after what was supposed to be their routine. Evan wrapped his arm around her as she held the frame.

"So, what's on the agenda for today?" he asked.

"You want the grand tour?"

"Shouldn't take too long in a town like this," he said, grabbing a few things out of his bag.

For some reason, she was shocked by the statement. He'd grown up in L.A. and didn't understand the small town mentality. He couldn't wrap his head around how people did it. He lived for the pulse of the city. But the previous evening had served as a reminder to her that small towns were perfect in their own ways. She wouldn't dream of walking along a dark path in L.A. at 1:30 in the morning, and yet here, she felt completely safe and at home doing it. Part of her had ached for that while she was away.

They got dressed and went downstairs to Peyton's car. Her father had kept the old convertible. He didn't have the heart to sell it - it was always _her_ car.

"_This_ is your car?" he asked raising an eyebrow.

"Hey! I love this car!" she said, hopping in the driver's seat. She felt completely at home behind the wheel of this old car. "Just get in!"

She drove through the town, pointing out the high school and her favourite stores and parks. She showed him the Clothes Over Bros store, which she explained used to be Karen's Café. She drove past the River Court and was relieved to find it empty. She took a different route back to her house, driving through a cul de sac. She had completely forgotten that Lucas' house was on the way until it was too late. All she could do was hope that he wasn't home, or that he was inside. She knew he'd recognize her car immediately. She wasn't sure why she felt the need to hide Evan from him, but she didn't want the two to meet, though she knew they would eventually.

She thought of his car remembering the hours the two had spent driving in that old Mustang. But Lucas was nowhere to be seen, and she let out a sigh of relief.

When they arrived back at her house, Evan went to the living room and set up his computer. She'd heard his Blackberry going off all morning, so she knew he had work to do.

"Do you mind if I just return some calls and emails?" he asked, settling into a spot on the couch.

"No, go ahead," she said. "I think I'm going to go see if I can't have a late lunch with Haley and Brooke."

"OK, sweetie," he said, looking up at her from his computer screen. "Love you," he said.

She walked over and kissed his lips gently. "Love you, too."

Peyton sat in the front seat of her car again, and dialed Brooke's number.

"Hey! Are you here?!" Brooke said excitedly.

"I am. What are you doing right now?"

"I'm just at the store. Come over right now! I'll call Haley!"

"OK, Brooke, but calm down!" she said. "I'll see you in a few."

Peyton started her car and drove towards downtown Tree Hill, and saw the familiar Mustang heading towards her. She got butterflies in her stomach at the sight of it. _'What the hell is wrong with me?' _she thought. She looked down at the ring on her finger and thought of Evan.

He noticed her car coming towards him, and turned right onto the closest street. He couldn't face her in daylight. He couldn't see those eyes and that face and be able to be OK with her marrying someone else. He didn't know how he was going to get her back. But he knew he had to try.

Peyton parked across the street from the store, and before she could even cross the street, Brooke and Haley were running towards her. They crashed into a tight hug before Brooke pulled away and grabbed Peyton's hand.

"Tiffany, princess cut. Nice!" she said. "Where is he? We want to meet him!"

The three women walked back into the store. "He's home. Working."

"Working?" Haley asked. "It's your first day back!"

"I know, but I wanted to hang out with you guys alone first." It wasn't really a lie. She had missed her two best friends.

The three of them spent the afternoon in the boutique, talking and catching up. Nathan and Jamie had popped in to say hi, but other than that, it was just the three girls, like old times. Around 4:00, Haley announced that she had to go.

"I'm picking Lucas up and he's coming over for dinner," she said, then grimaced when she realized she'd broken the rules - they weren't supposed to talk about him.

"I saw him last night," Peyton said.

"You got in at midnight!" Brooke shouted. "And you've already seen him?"

"It wasn't like that. I couldn't sleep, so I went to the River Court."

"And?" Haley asked.

"No one's self destructed yet," Peyton said, checking the clock on the wall. "I should go, too. I should probably feed Evan." She picked up her bag, and Brooke came to hug her again.

"It's really good to have you back, Peyton," she said softly.

"It's really good to see you guys. I missed this," Peyton admitted.

Peyton and Haley walked out of the store together.

"So look, I know Lucas is going to put on a brave face through all this, but it's probably going to be really hard on him," Haley said. "If I have to spend a lot of time with him, I don't want you to think..."

"Oh God, Haley," Peyton interrupted. "Of course. I completely understand."

The two women went their separate ways, but Peyton's heart broke a little at the thought of Lucas hurting because of her, though she'd hurt so much because of him.

She walked through the front door of her house and into the living room, to see Evan sleeping on the couch with a case file laying on his stomach. She knelt beside him and brushed his face with her hand, causing him to wake up.

"Hi," she said, kissing his forehead.

"Hi," he echoed. "I must be jet lagged." He sat up and placed the file on the coffee table.

"Evan, it's 4:30. Which means it's 1:30 in L.A." she said, sitting on his lap.

"Either way," he joked. "You have fun with the girls?"

"Yeah. I miss them," she said, running her hand through his short dark hair. He just nodded and smiled and kissed her temple. He didn't ask when he could meet them, or say how much he was looking forward to it, or reassure her that she had the next 6 weeks to spend with them.

He just nodded.


	3. Chapter 3

They'd been in Tree Hill a week. She hadn't seen Lucas since the night at the River Court. She was equal parts relieved and disappointed. Something inside her wanted to see him. She wanted to talk to him and be near him. She'd been feeling guilty about it all week. And also guilty that she was keeping Brooke, Nathan, and Haley from him. She knew he needed them too, and she felt like she was taking up the time they'd usually spend with him.

Evan had met everyone and gotten rave reviews, but Nathan harbored some doubt that he later expressed to Haley. He played it off as just being protective of Peyton, but there was something about the guy that he couldn't put his finger on. He wasn't anything special. He was like every other lawyer Nathan had ever met. He wasn't good enough for Peyton. He wasn't Lucas.

Peyton woke up Sunday morning, taking a moment to remember where she was, and reached over to find that Evan wasn't next to her. She checked the clock, and noticed it was 11:00. They were supposed to be out of the house already, looking for a place for the wedding. She got out of bed and went downstairs and saw Evan sitting in front of his computer again. She understood that he had to work, but she was angry he hadn't woken her.

"Why didn't you get me up?!" she asked, sitting next to him.

"I knew how tired you were last night, and I thought I'd get some work done," he said, looking up from the screen. "They need me in L.A."

"What? We've only been here a week, Evan."

"I know. But it's work. I'm already pushing it by even asking for so much time off. I'll only be gone a week. Two at most."

"Two weeks!?" she shouted.

"I'm sorry, Peyton, but I have to go," he said, grabbing her hand.

"So what am I supposed to do?" she asked. "I can't plan this wedding alone."

"You have Brooke and Haley. I can't risk my job, Peyton." He stood and began packing his computer away, and she noticed the bag sitting next to him.

"I understand," she said. But it was only a partial truth.

20 minutes later, he was driving away in a cab.

_People always leave..._

_--_

"So Luke, you got a plan yet?" Skills asked, throwing the ball to the blonde.

"Plan for what?" he asked, but he knew what his friend was referring to.

"Nate says you're gonna try to get Peyon not to marry this dude."

"No. I don't have a plan," Lucas said, letting a shot go. "You met him, right?"

"Yeah, I met him," Skills answered, holding the ball to his hip.

"And? What do you think?"

"I think he's a big time lawyer and you're a small time basketball coach," Skills laughed.

"Thanks, man." Lucas shook his head.

"Look, Lucas, you know you and P. Sawyer have a crazy history. Maybe that's all you have though, dog. She's pretty happy with this guy. You just don't know her anymore."

_That's it,_ Lucas thought. He did know her. He knew her better than anyone. He just had to prove that to her. Once he showed her that, she'd realize this guy would never know her like he did.

"Right," he said softly.

--

"So he left?" Haley asked skeptically.

"Yeah. His job's really demanding. I should have known he couldn't take this much time away from the office," Peyton explained.

The two of them were sitting in Peyton's living room with Nathan and Jamie. Nathan felt something rise up inside him. What kind of man leaves his wife-to-be to plan an entire wedding alone? He tried not to judge Evan - he hardly knew him - but it was hard not to, seeing Peyton like this, with disappointment on her face.

"Well, look, we'll help out however we can. Right Jamie?"

"Sure, mama!" Jamie said, jumping up off the chair he was sitting on. Peyton grabbed him in her arms.

"Thanks, buddy," she said, kissing his forehead. This kid looked so much like his uncle that it was almost hard for her to be around him.

"We have to get going. We are dropping Jamie off at Skills' and Mouth's while mommy and daddy go on a little date," Haley said, making Nathan smile at the thought of spending an entire night alone with his wife.

"OK," Peyton said, walking them to the door. "I'll see you guys later."

The Scotts left and Peyton was alone in her house. After about an hour, the silence started eating away at her. She needed to get out.

She drove through the town until she came to Tric. She hadn't been inside for years. She suddenly had the urge to peek inside and check out the space. This was, after all, the building where she learned she could make a future for herself in the music industry.

She parked her car and made her way up the stairs and into the club. The sunlight was pouring through the windows, and she surveyed the space before her. Then she noticed him sitting at a table with papers sprawled out in front of him. She was going to try to sneak out unnoticed, but her keys clinked together in her hands and called his attention to her. She noticed his blue eyes even from across the room.

"Hi," she said, nervously waving a hand in his direction and walking towards him slowly.

"Where's Ethan?" he asked, looking back to his papers.

"Evan," she corrected him.

"Whatever."

She rolled her eyes and took the seat across from him. "He had to go back to L.A. for a couple weeks."

Lucas looked up at her again and felt his heart rate speed up. He had the guy out of his way for a bit. And God, she was so beautiful. A few of his questions were answered - yes, she still wore the same perfume, and he could tell already that she was just as stubborn as ever. Then he noticed the ring on her finger. Where his ring was supposed to be.

"I'm starting to wonder if this guy even exists," he said, deadpan. She only sighed in response.

"I'm gonna go," she said after a moment, moving to stand from her seat.

"You don't have to," he said quickly, placing a hand on her forearm. "I'm sorry."

She felt a spark run through her body as he touched her. _Dammit_, she thought. How could he still have that effect on her? It had been three years since she'd last seen him, and he could still make her weak in the knees just by touching her in such an innocent way. She avoided the stare she knew was on her and gently pulled her arm away from his grasp.

"The place looks good," she observed, surveying the room.

"Yeah, we made a couple changes," he said, following her gaze. "I help out with a lot of the business stuff now that my mom's away."

"Yeah, Haley told me she's been traveling. That's great. She always wanted to do that," she said, meeting his eyes again.

There was an uncomfortable silence and the two just stared at each other. Actually, the silence wasn't that uncomfortable. The two shared a connection, there was no doubt, and they had always been able to be in each others' company without having to speak.

Lucas broke the gaze first, looking back down to the papers in front of him, but not before seeing the diamond sparkle on her hand as she brushed a piece of hair from her face.

"Nice ring," he said, still with his head down.

"Lucas, what do you want?" she asked angrily, dropping her hands onto the table in front of her.

"You're the one who showed up here," he said.

"I came to look at the club, not to be judged on my life choices," she said bitterly, standing and grabbing her purse off the table.

"I'm not judging you, Peyton." He stood in front of her. "I'm just...having a hard time with this," he admitted.

"I get it," she said softly, looking to the floor.

"You do?" he asked.

"Yeah." She looked up to him again. "I know it's weird that I'm here."

He exhaled a breathy laugh and shook his head slowly. "It's not that you're here, Peyton. It's that you're getting _married_." He put extra emphasis on the last word.

"It's been three years, Luke. You left, and I moved on. You should too," she said, making her way towards the exit. She was almost at the stairs when he finally called after her, making her stop.

"You never said no," he said to her back.

She felt the lump forming in her throat. She waited an entire year for him to realize that, and he never did. And now she was happy with someone else and all of a sudden he becomes enlightened to the fact? Part of her wanted to slap him, part of her wanted to kiss him. Instead, she just kept walking.

--

She sat in her car for a few moments, and wiped the tear that had fallen. Why was she crying over him again? She took a deep breath and her phone rang in her bag.

"Hey gorgeous," Evan's voice cut through the line.

"Hey you," she replied, trying to hide the flurry of emotions in her voice.

"I just wanted to call and let you know I got here safe. And I miss you already," he said.

"I miss you too," she echoed, with another tear falling.

"I'll let you go, I know it's almost dinner there, but I'll talk to you tomorrow, OK?" he said.

"Sure." She turned the key and began pulling away from the curb.

"I love you."

"Love you, too," she said, and hung up.

Lucas watched her drive away, and could have sworn he saw her wipe her eyes as she drove down the street, and he knew that he could still reach her. There was still something there.

Peyton got home and went to her bedroom and, for the first time in two years, she let herself cry over Lucas Scott. Not just a tear, not choking back her emotions. She had a good, long, overdue cry over the man who'd walked away from her in that hotel room. She hadn't felt like this for two years. Their encounter had left her completely confused. She wanted to talk to him about it, but she knew she couldn't. She had Evan. Evan was the man for her. She knew he was the right choice.

But, she thought, did she really have a choice?

When she woke up the next morning, she drove past Lucas' house. She wanted to have a rational conversation with him and find out exactly what he'd been getting at yesterday. She noticed his car wasn't there, but knocked anyway. No answer.

She drove to Nathan and Haley's with her stomach in knots. Maybe he was there. She really needed to talk to him. But the more she searched the town for him, the guiltier she felt doing it. She was engaged to someone else, and instead of planning her wedding, here she was searching out the man who had broken her heart.

She walked into Nathan and Haley's house without knocking - their door was always open to friends - and found Nathan in the kitchen making himself a protein shake.

"Hey Peyton," he greeted her.

"Hey Nathan. Is Lucas here?" she asked. The question caught him off guard. Why was she looking for him?

"No, he's out with Haley and Jamie," he answered with confusion on his face.

"OK. Thanks."

"You want me to tell him you were looking for him when I see him?" he asked.

"No. It's nothing," she said, turning to leave.

After a short pause, Nathan said something he was worried she might kill him for.

"You still love him, don't you? Lucas."

She turned on her heel to face Nathan. "I have to go," she said.

Nathan just stood in the kitchen and let out a chuckle while shaking his head. Things were about to get interesting.


	4. Chapter 4

"Peyton, you haven't even _thought_ about the dress yet? The wedding is less than 5 weeks away!" Brooke said, trying to show Peyton some sketches she'd done.

"I know! It's just kind of hard to get into planning mode when your fiancée is M.I.A." Peyton said, aimlessly playing with a pen on the counter in Brooke's store.

"He's not M.I.A., he's just across the country," Brooke rationalized. "Do you have a colour scheme yet?"

"Brooke!" Peyton shouted, startling her friend. "I just can't think about this now."

Since that morning and the question Nathan had so bluntly posed to her, Peyton's head had been completely all over the place. She couldn't think of anything other than - _what if he was right?_ What if somehow, on some level, she was still in love with Lucas?

"Look, I know this is tough for you right now, but you really need to get on top of things. I can't just make a wedding dress magically appear." Brooke looked at her friend in the eyes, sensing something else was going on in her head.

"I know. I just...I have to go," she said, walking towards the door.

"Peyton!" Brooke protested.

"I have to go!" the blonde insisted.

"Don't forget about dinner at my place tonight! Everyone's coming!" she shouted as Peyton left. The blonde held up a hand and waved in acknowledgment.

"What the hell just happened?" Brooke asked aloud to no one when the door slammed behind her best friend.

--

Peyton spent the rest of her day at home, attempting to work. She returned emails she'd put off replying to, and looked over some cover art that had been sent to her for one of the acts her label managed. She spent two hours at her kitchen table, listening to music and distracting herself from work.

When the doorbell rang, it startled her. She got up from her seat and answered the door.

"Miss Sawyer?" the man asked. "Delivery for you."

She took the vase from him, said thank you, and closed the door. She took the flowers to the kitchen table and opened the card.

_'I didn't forget...Love, Evan'_

He'd been sending her red roses since the day he first said he loved her. Every 12 days, 12 roses. He was wonderful, and she loved the gesture.

She called him to thank him for the flowers, and when she hung up the phone, she was reassured that he was the man for her. He was thoughtful and considerate and sweet. So he had to work for a few days. She could understand that. His clients paid a lot of money to be represented by him. She loved that he was so in demand and took his job so seriously. She loved him.

She quickly glanced at the clock and realized she had to be at Brooke's in an hour, so she went to her room to change for the evening. She pulled on a simple black dress and black sandals. She pulled her hair up out of her face, and let a few stray pieces fall, framing her face. It was casual, but dressy enough for this dinner party. Apparently 'everyone' was going to be there. She assumed that included Lucas, and made a pact with herself to avoid him for the evening. How hard could it be?

Apparently, it wasn't going to be as easy as she thought. When she pulled up to Brooke's house, she noticed him walking from his car to the door. She parked her car and got out. He saw her drive up, and watched her as she swung her legs out the door of the car. Those long, now tanned, legs he'd spent so many hours watching as a teenager. The ones he never got tired of waking up tangled in his. He smiled slightly as she joined him at the door. He'd already knocked and was waiting for an answer.

"Hi!" Brooke said, before noticing the two people before her, then her tone changed. "Oh. Hi. Come in, guys." She knew how uncomfortable that must have been for both of them. Peyton hadn't said as much, but Brooke assumed her friend's strange mood had to do with the brooding blonde.

Nathan and Haley were already inside, as well as Skills, Mouth, Fergie and Junk. Apparently Lucas and Peyton were the last to arrive.

"Who needs drinks?" Brooke asked.

"I do," Lucas and Peyton both said at the same time.

Once everyone had full glasses, Brooke ushered everyone to the patio overlooking the river.

"Peyton, that dress is awesome," Brooke noted.

"Uh, thanks Brooke. You designed it," the blonde replied, making everyone else laugh.

Lucas looked Peyton up and down again, and had to stop himself before someone else noticed. Too late. Nathan was looking at his brother and shaking his head with a grin.

The friends made small talk until they fell back into the rhythm of all being in the same place again. They spent the evening joking and talking. It felt nice for Peyton to be among these people again. Friends. There were no agendas. No one was using her to try to gain access to her boss. There were no stuffy lawyer colleagues making bad jokes. It was just comfortable. It felt normal to her.

She slipped inside the house to refill her wine glass. While in the kitchen, she heard someone come up behind her. She smelled his cologne before she even saw his face.

"Hi," he said softly.

"Hey, Luke," she replied, turning to face him

"Nathan said you were looking for me this morning," he said, watching her pour white wine into her glass.

"Oh. Well..." she paused, making a mental note to kick Nathan's ass later. "It was nothing."

"Liar," he said with a grin.

"Excuse me?" she asked, narrowing her eyes.

He took the bottle from her hand and filled his own glass. "I can still tell when you're lying, Peyt."

She rolled her eyes and grinned at his use of the nickname. "OK, look," she started. "You said something yesterday that I've been trying really hard to forget about, but I can't."

He knew exactly what she was referring to. "You never said no."

"What the hell, Luke?" she said, raising her voice slightly.

"You didn't. I didn't understand that at the time, but I do now." He looked into her eyes.

"What? Are you kidding me?" she asked angrily. "Luke, you can't just say that! it doesn't change anything. I'm getting married in 5 weeks."

The word _married_ just about gave him a heart attack. He knew it was the truth, but every time he heard it, it was like his heart was breaking all over again.

"Peyton," he said softly, taking a step towards her, "I made a mistake that night, walking away from you. I should have waited."

She let out a breath and shook her head at the words. "But you didn't. You couldn't wait. You gave up on us, so I moved on, Lucas." Her tone was calm. She was trying to hide the hurt she felt having to even say those words.

"I gave up?" he asked.

"You couldn't wait a year for me? One year, I asked for." She paused to take a deep breath before continuing. "And you didn't love me enough to do it."

Her words stung his heart. They were so untrue that he didn't know how to respond. "You think I didn't love you?"

"If you did, you would have waited." She placed her glass on the counter and looked away from him.

"So what is this? What am I doing now?" he asked.

"You're confused," she said. "You are just feeling sentimental about the way things used to be."

"No. Don't say that! I've been miserable without you for three years."

"You only want me when you can't have me. It's the way it's always been," she said, needing to believe that herself. He pulled his head back in disbelief of her words.

"I've always wanted you. _That's_ the way it's always been." He paused and leaned forward to whisper into her ear. "Don't marry him."

"Lucas..." she said. His hands found her shoulders and she was forced to look at him.

"Don't. Marry. Him." He begged her with every word. His eyes met hers and she felt herself giving in. With his hands on her and his intense blue eyes staring at her, she knew she had to look away. But before she could, his lips pressed against hers. She pulled away quickly, shocked at how brazen he was being, but when she looked into his eyes again, she saw pain and sadness and heartache. But she also just saw _him_. Before she could stop herself, she had pulled his face back towards hers and was kissing him. His arms were around her body, holding her as if he was never going to let go.

They parted after a short while and she kept her eyes closed, aware of what she'd just done. That was how a kiss was supposed to feel.

"I need you," he whispered.

"It's too late for that," she said. She grabbed her purse from the table in the hallway and left the house. He heard her car start and leaned his head back. Had that just happened? They had kissed. He couldn't believe that she hadn't felt the same rush of emotions he had when their lips met.

Little did either of them know that Brooke had seen her best friend kiss her ex-boyfriend and walk out of the party. She watched Lucas hang his head, standing in her kitchen. She walked towards him.

"Lucas," she said, startling him, "Let me ask you a question. Do you _ever_ kiss Peyton when one of you _isn't_ in a relationship with someone else?"

"Brooke..."

"No, jackass. You don't get to explain," she said angrily, pointing at him. "You don't get it. _You_ broke her heart. _You_ left her. And now she's happy with someone else. She's happy, Luke! Don't screw with her."

"Brooke, it's not that easy," he said, his tone matching hers.

"It _is_ that easy! You had your shot! You blew it. Deal with it."

"I can't," he said softly.

"Why? Why can't you?" she asked.

"Because_ I'm in love _with her!" he said powerfully, looking Brooke straight in the eye. In that moment, it was the only thing in the world that he knew for sure. It was the only truth that meant anything to him.

"Lucas..."

"Brooke, I can't be without her," he interrupted her. "I've tried, OK. I've tried and I can't do it." He paused and ran a hand through his hair. "I need her."

All the thoughts Brooke had initially had about her best friend marrying the wrong person had just been confirmed. Lucas Scott would always be in love with Peyton Sawyer. He wrote an entire book about it. She'd listened to Peyton cry to her on the phone at 2 a.m. about how he hadn't meant those words, but in this moment, with him standing defeated in her kitchen, Brooke now knew what he knew. That he and Peyton were meant to be together.

"So, what are we going to do about it?" she asked.

His eyes met hers, and he knew that she understood.

--

Peyton slammed her front door of her house behind her and marched straight to her kitchen, knowing there was a bottle of wine there. She'd bought it for her and Evan; it was his favourite. But he wasn't here. And him not being here had made Lucas say those words. She knew him, and if her fiancée had been there, Lucas wouldn't have spoken to her like that - with such disregard for her relationship.

She grabbed a glass and poured the red liquid into it, bringing the rim of the glass to her lips as she quelled a sob. She knew she shouldn't have driven home in the state she had - after two glasses of wine, and tears streaming from her eyes, but she couldn't stay there. She couldn't stay there with him. Being near him made her completely...crazy. She was a version of herself that she hadn't been in three years. He left that person in a hotel room in L.A., and until now, she thought that person was dead.

That person, that Peyton, had so much hope and desire and determination. She had passion for art and music and for love itself. She had dreams and aspirations. She had a life planned out in her head with the man she loved. Now those things were coming true, but it wasn't because she was trying. She wasn't. She was going through the motions, without really moving at all. She worked hard, of course, and loved her job. She wanted to move up the ladder, but that want wasn't a _desire_. She used to think she could do anything- she truly believed that. She used to believe in a love that was pure and true and strong that it could overcome anything. She used to believe in soul mates. She used to be a person who believed in things - in anything that she could. And Lucas helped her to believe. But when he left, he took that person with him. He made her that person, and he just as easily destroyed her.

She grabbed the bottle in one hand and the glass in the other, and began making her way to the stairs. She spotted the roses out of the corner of her eye and immediately resented them, and everything they represented. Maybe if she hadn't been with Evan, Lucas would have come for her. Maybe if she'd just gone to see Lucas when he was in L.A., they'd be together. Thinking that way made her sob even harder. How could she think that? Evan hadn't done anything wrong. Ever. He was perfect. He was the right guy. He treated her like a queen, and here she was, playing 'what if' over the man who broke her heart. There was no what if. There was done. There was over. There was history, and the past, and the high school love. The first love. You don't forget your first love.

Once she was in her room, she only felt 18 again. She looked at the artwork she'd done then, and it all centered around Lucas. She looked at her record collection, and realized that she could probably pin point a memory that each album had been a soundtrack to.

She needed to get rid of him completely. She wasn't that person any more, and in this moment, she was sure she didn't want to be that person. No, she'd never been happier than when she was with Lucas, but she also hadn't felt a heartache like she had when she woke up in that hotel room to find him gone.

After another glass of wine, she dialed a familiar number.

"Peyton, sweetie, I wasn't expecting you to call," Evan said.

"I know. I just...needed to hear your voice," she spoke softly. She was relieved to hear him. She felt like herself again. Her new self. The self she'd been for two years.

"I miss you too," he said. She could hear him smile on the other end of the line.

"Listen, I want to get married right away," she said abruptly.

"Peyton, we're getting married in 5 weeks. That's right away," he said, his voice laced with concern.

"No!" she said, perhaps too quickly. "I mean as soon as possible. As soon as possible without just going to city hall."

"I have to be here for another week and a half at the very least..." he said. She could tell he was nervous about her sudden need to change the date of the wedding.

"Then in two weeks," she pleaded. "Evan, I just want to be married to you." She held in another sob and her breathing sped up. She did want to be married to him. She wanted that with everything in her. She needed to marry him and get back to her life, to their life. And she needed to get away from Lucas.

"I want to be married to you, too, honey." Even with 3,000 miles between them, he couldn't say no to her. "OK. If you can organize everything, you just tell me when I have to put on the tux."

"I will take care of everything," she said softly, hoping he wouldn't hear her tears.

"I love you, Peyton."

"I love you, too," she said.

And she desperately hoped that was true.


	5. Chapter 5

Nathan was surprised the night before when Brooke came up with the lame excuse that Peyton went home complaining of a stomach ache. He didn't believe her, because when he looked at his brother's face, it had guilt written all over it.

He stopped at Peyton's place around 11:00 the next morning, just to check on her and see that she was OK. The Peyton he knew would probably laugh at her for ever doubting it, but something in him told him that he needed to confirm it.

He walked up the steps to her house and tapped on the door. There was no answer, so he tried again. Still nothing. He turned the knob, and was surprised to fund the door unlocked. Stepping inside, he saw her shoes and purse from the night before strewn in the foyer. He took a quick look on the ground floor and didn't see her. The house was quiet, so he made his way up the stairs and peered into her bedroom. She was laying in her bed, in the same dress she'd worn the previous evening, with an empty wine bottle sitting on her bedside table. He leaned against the door frame and crossed his arms.

She wasn't OK.

"Peyton," he said softly, walking towards the bed. "Peyton," he repeated, louder this time, and gently shook her sleeping frame.

"Huh? What?" she sat up and looked at him, then brought a hand to her forehead and mumbled something incoherent.

"Hi," he said quietly, sitting on the edge of her bed next to her.

"Hi," she grumbled.

"How's that bottle of wine treating you?" he attempted to joke, and just shook his head at the death glare he got in return.

"Sorry about last night," she said.

"Don't be sorry," he said, shaking his head. "I was worried about you, though."

"Why?" she asked, laying her aching head back on her pillow.

"I thought you might get all upset and come home and drink yourself to sleep in your angsty bedroom with Lucas all over the walls," he deadpanned.

She shot him another look. "He isn't on my walls."

"Peyton, that heart?" He pointed to the red heart she'd been tracing for years. "All these other sketches and drawings? I know..." he said.

"Whatever, Nate. I..." her voice trailed.

"You what?" he asked. She sighed closed her eyes.

"He said he needs me, Nathan." She looked over at him then, and he could see the pain in her eyes. "He told me not to marry Evan."

"Bastard," Nathan said, hanging his head. As much as he wanted his brother and this woman together, he couldn't help but wish Lucas had taken a more subtle approach.

"I know. I called Evan," she said, and his eyes shot up to meet hers. He wasn't sure what he hoped for- that she had broken off her engagement, or that she was going to explain to him how much she loved this guy. "We're moving up the wedding."

"Peyton, are you sure?" he asked, shaking his head slightly.

"Yes. I want to marry him," she said vehemently.

"I think that's what you want," he said, looking down at his hands.

"That's what I just said." She looked at him with confusion.

"No. I mean, I think you _want_ to want him. But I think you still have someone else in your heart," he said softly.

"Dammit, Nathan! Are you and Lucas like...teaming up on me or something!?" she shouted.

"It's not like that," he tried to convince her. "I just don't want to see you make a mistake."

"Evan is not a mistake. Lucas is a mistake. Loving him and thinking that he and I were meant to be was a mistake. Letting him convince me that he loved me? _That_ was a mistake."

"Peyton..."

"No, Nathan! Don't defend him. He proposed to me!" she yelled again.

"I know he did, but..."

"But nothing!" she interrupted. "He was talking about forever, and wouldn't wait for me? How fucked up is that? He didn't want forever. He wanted the satisfaction of knowing that someone wanted _him_ for forever. It was never about me. It was never about us. It was about him."

"I don't think that's true," Nathan said, trying to calm her.

"You don't have to think it's true. It's what I know is true." She turned onto her side so she wasn't facing him anymore. He took that as his queue to leave.

"Peyton, I just want to see you happy. And you wouldn't have come back here and drank this whole bottle of wine if you didn't have some sort of lingering feelings for Lucas. I'm just saying." He stood at the door, waiting for a response, but didn't get one. "Look, Haley and I are out of town for the day, OK? But if you need me, you know my number." He saw her nod, and he walked out of the room and ran a hand through his short hair.

When did life get so messed up? Since they were teenagers, it was always Lucas and Peyton, and Nathan and Haley. How had those two gotten so off track? Seeing the pain in Peyton's eyes when she talked about Lucas just made him even more grateful for his wife and his family. He couldn't even fathom hurting someone like that, even though he knew that Lucas still loved her.

He knew he had to help his brother. The Peyton he just talked to was not the Peyton he knew. This Peyton wasn't happy. She wasn't even in the same neighbourhood as happy.

Nathan left her house and sat in his car for a few minutes trying to think of what his next move should be. Did he give her time and space? Did he try to get Haley and Brooke to talk sense into her? He wondered how everyone else could see everything so clearly, yet the girl herself couldn't wrap her head around it. It was then that he realized just how deeply she'd buried Lucas. She'd locked him away in a corner of her heart that she didn't want anyone going near. But still, he knew that that piece of her heart was a big one, and that his brother, no matter how much a mess he was, was the only one who could make her realize what a huge mistake she was about to make.

--

"Brooke, what are you doing here?" Lucas asked as she closed the door behind her and made herself comfortable next to him on his couch.

"You need a plan, and I'm a genius. That's what I'm doing here," she said with a devilish grin.

He sighed and closed his eyes, both afraid of and anticipating whatever it was she was about to say.

"So I was thinking, you should take her on a little trip down memory lane," Brooke started.

"She hates me, Brooke, she's not going to agree to being near me," he countered.

"First of all, she doesn't hate you. Second of all, what if she doesn't know about it?" the brunette asked.

"I am not going to trick her into anything, OK?" he insisted. "If she doesn't want me, then she doesn't want me. I can't do anything about it."

"Do you hear yourself? You are Lucas Scott!" she shouted, slightly annoyed at how passive he was being. "She can't say no to you. She's never been able to, contrary to what you might have thought she said in that hotel room in..."

"Brooke!" he interrupted.

"Right. So what is your genius plan, then? You can't just give up," she stated.

"I know. I just...if she's happy, I have to let her go," he said, dejected.

"What if she's not?" Brooke asked softly.

His head snapped to meet her eyes. "Isn't she?"

"Not like she was when she was with you," she told him. She watched the expression on his face. "So what's the plan?"

"I don't have one. I just know that it's me and her."

"So you're just going to sit back and hope she realizes that?" she asked.

"Something like that," he said softly. "I just have to convince her that I love her somehow."

"Just be here, Lucas," Brooke stated. He looked at her with curiosity in his eyes. "All she needs is for you to prove you're here. Really _here_."

Hew knew what she meant. She meant for him to be present. The connection he and Peyton had would do the rest of the work.

Or so he hoped.

--

After Nathan left, Peyton took two advil and had a shower. She got dressed in an old Guns 'N Roses tee shirt and a pair of ripped jeans, and pulled on her black Converse sneakers. She looked like a high school kid, but she didn't care. She needed to get into her car and drive.

She pulled the top back and let the sunshine hit her face while she drove, listening to a mix of her current favourite songs. The lyrics to _Sweet and Low_ by Augustana resonated with her, so she turned the volume up even louder as she drove the back roads of the town. She drove past the beach, reminding her of her new home and life across the country. She drove past rows of modest houses, signifying her past and the town she grew up in. She drove through the neighbourhood Brooke and Nathan had both grown up in, where she'd spent more time than at her own house. She drove past the River Court, where two young boys were playing a friendly game of one-on-one, reminding her of the night that turned all their worlds upside down.

She was driving a narrow road, and was so lost in her music that didn't realize where she was until she came upon a clearing next to the road. She had a flashback to the first time they met, but was pulled from her memory when her car sputtered and she noticed smoke coming from beneath the hood.

"You have _GOT_ to be kidding me!" she shouted, looking skyward.

She pulled over to the side of the road, to the familiar spot she had visited so many times in her head over the years. She remembered the first time she was here, then the second, her senior year when she realized just how much she loved him, then the third, before she said goodbye to Lucas and left for L.A.

She began dialing Nathan, then remembered he was out of town. She tried Brooke, but her phone went to voicemail, informing callers that she was in meetings all day. She didn't have Skills' or Mouths' numbers.

She closed her eyes tightly and breathed as much air as her lungs would allow. She scrolled through the names on her phone before stopping on the one she knew she'd be forced to call. _Lucas Scott_. She reluctantly pressed the green talk button and waited with bated breath, half hoping he wouldn't answer.

"Hi," he said timidly and unable to hide the surprise in his voice.

"Hi Luke," she said, her tone expressing her desperation.

"What's wrong, are you OK?" he asked hurriedly.

"What? Something has to be wrong for me to call you?" she joked.

"I just figured I'm not your favourite person..." his voice trailed. "But I'm glad nothing's wrong."

If he only knew the inner battle she'd been having wanting to prove that statement to be true.

"Actually, my car broke down," she said softly.

"Are you kidding?" he asked.

"No. That's what I said, too," she chuckled.

"OK, well where are you?" he asked. She could hear him grab his keys.

"You'll _never_ guess," she stated. He just laughed.

"I'll be there in a few minutes."

She stood leaning against her car and looking out over the water that was running next to her car. She was lost in thought and almost didn't hear him drive up, until she heard his tires crunching the gravel of the shoulder. She turned to look at him walking towards her with a jug of some sort of fluid in his hand.

"You sure you weren't just feeling sentimental?" he asked with his famous grin. Well, famous to her. The image of his face, the corner of his mouth slightly upturned, was burned in her memory.

"Funny," she said, with her head tilted slightly to the side.

He chuckled and ducked beneath the hood, looking for the problem.

"I figured it was the radiator," he said. "Always is, huh?"

She could only sigh in response. He poured the fluid into the proper compartment and closed the hood, wiping his hands on his jeans.

"Look, I'll follow you to the shop - you should have them check it out to make sure it's nothing more serious - and I'll give you a lift home," he said, raising his hand to shield his eyes from the sun. She pretended not to notice the muscles of his arm ripple as he moved.

"Luke, you don't have to do that," she shook her head.

"Maybe I just don't want you calling me in 15 minutes telling me you're stranded again," he teased.

"Ugh! Fine!" she said, getting in her car. He smiled and shook his head and started walking back to his. "Hey, Luke," she shouted.

"It's no problem," he said with a grin.

He let her drive away first, and couldn't help but smile at the sight of her in that car, hair blowing wildly in the wind, bobbing her head in time with the music. He knew she'd be able to see his smile in her rear view, but he didn't care. He'd been perfectly clear about his feelings for her. They drove into the town, their vintage cars weaving their ways through familiar streets. She pulled up to the shop and waited for him to get out of his car behind her.

"What are you waiting for?" he asked jokingly.

"Right, like I know what the hell to tell them. That's your territory," she said smiling.

Once they'd explained what had happened and she left the keys with the mechanic, they walked back to Lucas' car and she climbed in. She didn't know what to say, and he seemed nervous, so neither of them said a word until they got to her house.

"Listen, you want to come in for coffee?" she asked, and when he raised an eyebrow she continued. "It's the least I can do."

"OK," he replied with a slight nod. His exterior was calm, but his heart was racing.

Once inside, he followed her to the kitchen and took a seat at the table as she got out the French press and began boiling water and grinding beans. He pretended not to notice the roses on the table.

"Wow, have those years in L.A. turned you into a coffee snob?" he joked.

"Nothing wrong with wanting the best," she replied with a grin. "I'm sorry I bothered you today, Luke. You're always..." Her voice trailed as she thought of the words she was about to say, and the significance they held for the two of them.

"Someone's got to," he replied softly, his eyes full of emotion.

She waited a few moments, letting the weight of those words sink in. "Still, didn't you have something else you had to do today? I can't imagine emergency car repair and sipping coffee are all that's on the agenda."

"Peyton, I'm just a high school basketball coach," he said, with a self-deprecating smile. "From June to September, this is pretty much all I have going on." He was proud of himself. He'd resisted the urge to make a snide remark about her absentee fiancée.

She didn't know if he meant to do it, but he was being modest, almost to a fault.

"_Just_ a coach, Lucas? Whitey would kick your ass if he heard you say those words." He laughed at the reference to the old man who'd shown him the ropes. "And surely you have writing to do and I know you're helping your mom."

"Writing. Right," he said, breaking eye contact. "That's not coming so easily now. Well, for the past few...um...years."

"Come on, Luke. I know you have ideas in there somewhere," she attempted to boost his ego slightly, while pouring coffee into two mugs and ignoring the amount of time he just referenced.

"I have nothing, Peyton." He looked at her as if to prove that the point was true. She saw the sadness in his eyes, and she knew that's how he felt. He felt he had nothing to write about. But she knew him, and she knew that he was full of greatness.

"Lucas Scott," she said firmly, sitting across from him. "You are a brilliant author and I don't believe for one second that you don't have something inside you just waiting to be written."

Her faith in him surprised him. He wasn't sure why - she'd always been supportive of him. But now, after all that had happened, it just reminded him how truly amazing this woman was. Even after all the hurt and pain he'd caused her, she still sat in front of him, encouraging him to be the best version of himself. He felt something inside him shift at the realization.

"Thank you," he said quietly, looking into the green eyes he was still so in love with. She smiled softly.

"Besides, didn't the last book do pretty well?" she asked somewhat bitterly.

"That was easier to write. I had inspiration," he said. He wasn't being subtle, so she decided not to be either.

"Well, either way, it's all fiction, right?" she said, her eyes meeting his again .

"What?" he asked, not hiding the shock in his voice.

"Your first book. It was just a story, right?" she asked nonchalantly, running her thumb up and down the handle of the mug in front of her.

"Are you...do you think I didn't mean those words?" he asked, leaning forward in anticipation of her response. He didn't get one. "I meant every one."

"OK, so you meant them," she said softly. She knew they were about to fight - again - but she had to get out the anger and hurt she had been trying to hold in. "You still left me in that hotel and didn't call me for three years. Forgive me if I'm not convinced that you ever really loved me. _Really_ loved me, Lucas."

"I could write 100 books about you and still have more words to say, Peyton."

"Luke, I..." she tried, but he interrupted.

"Peyton, I just need to you believe that," he pleaded.

"I don't want to." Her tone was cold and resolved, almost like a child refusing to do something that was requested.

"Why?" he asked, his voice laced with anger or disappointment, or both. "Why don't you?"

"Because I can't! I can't believe that you meant those things and that you loved me - that you still love me - and that you would do what you did. The only explanation for it is that you didn't love me at all. And thinking you didn't love me is easier than thinking that the man that I thought I knew - the man I gave my heart to - would do that to me." She stopped talking for a moment to take a breath. "You should know me well enough that I don't have to explain that."

"I know everything about you, Peyton. You know that," he said softly. His heart was breaking. He was, for some reason, just now realizing that as much as he was hurting, she had hurt more.

"No! You don't! You don't know that I pined and cried and wanted you for a year, Lucas. A whole damn year. And you never called. Not once. Not on my birthday, not on the anniversary of my mom's death, not even to tell me that you were in L.A." He stared at her confusedly then. "You think I didn't know you had a signing? I knew. And I was going to go. And I wanted _so badly_ for you to call me and tell me you wanted me there. But you never called. So I stopped waiting."

Her words tore his heart to pieces. She didn't want him any more. If she hadn't made it clear before, it was certainly clear now. He glanced tot he vase next to him, and waited for the pool of tears that was forming in his eye to dry before falling.

"Don't you hate roses?" he asked softly.

"They're from Evan," she deadpanned.

"That's not what I asked." He shook his head and his eyes met hers again.

"He sends me 12 red roses every 12 days." He scoffed and turned his head.

"You hate, roses, Peyton. You told me that lilies were your favourite flower. You said that roses are contrite."

"Lucas..." she started.

"The guy you're marrying should know that." He was not pulling any punches. He was going to lay it all on the table. He knew that no one would ever understand her like he did, and deep down, he knew that she knew it too.

"You're in denial. You don't want to believe that this is actually happening." She wrung her hands together, avoiding eye contact.

"How could you say yes to him and not to me?" His tone was calm, but he stood from his chair and wouldn't look at her when he posed the question. It was the one he'd wanted to ask since he found out she was engaged.

"There's no easy answer to that, Luke," she said.

"Yeah, there is!" he shouted. "And if you don't have it, maybe you shouldn't marry him."

"Wow, my ex-boyfriend doesn't want me to get married. Shocking," she said sarcastically, only adding to the palpable tension in the room.

"Just tell me that you love him more than you loved me," he pleaded. He didn't want to hear it, but if she said the words, it would be the final nail in the coffin and he might be able to start letting her go.

"Luke..." she she began, but then stopped herself. She couldn't say it. She'd never love anyone like she loved Lucas.

"Peyton, if this makes you happy, then fine. I'll deal with it. But if you can't answer a simple question, maybe _you're_ the one in denial. And you kissed me last night. You _kissed_ me. And it felt...it felt like I'd been sleepwalking for the last three years and you woke me up. You woke me up, Peyton." He paused before walking to where she was sitting. He crouched in front of her, placed his hands on her thighs, sending a chill through her body, and spoke softly. "Does he know your dad bought your mom lilies every Wednesday for as long as you can remember?"

Her eyes caught his as the tear fell. She tried so hard to blink it away and keep it from rolling down her cheek, but she couldn't. He reached out and wiped it away with the pad of his thumb, then rested his hand on her face. It was all she could do not to close her eyes and melt into his touch.

"He should know that," he said in a low voice.

He got up slowly and walked from the kitchen, and she waited until she heard the front door close before completely breaking down into loud sobs, with her head in her hands. He was right. She hadn't told Evan so many of these things. But a lot of them, she hadn't told them because for each and every single detail she wanted to share with him, she could remember vividly the first time she shared them.

With Lucas.


	6. Chapter 6

A couple days passed since her run-in with Lucas. She'd spent those days going over a few wedding things, and working on what she could so far away from the office. She stayed away from him and all the places he might be. But he was in the back of her mind. Way at the back, with all the other things she didn't like to think about. She talked to Evan a couple times a day. He'd check in to see how things were going, but any time she tried to ask his opinion on something for the wedding, he'd tell her it was all up to her and she'd get discouraged.

She met Nathan at the River Court. She'd taken him up on his offer to talk, but now that she was here, she didn't know what to say, so they were sitting in silence.

"What's wrong, Sawyer," he asked finally.

"I don't know. Maybe nothing," she said, but her words didn't convince him.

"Don't give me that. Luke told me about the other day," he said.

"Oh," she mumbled.

"Yeah. Oh," he echoed sarcastically. "What's going on, Peyton, because you don't seem too happy about Lucas, and Haley said you've been complaining about Evan being away, so...I mean, where's your head these days?"

"I just...I hate that he's so smug about everything!" she finally admitted. "Like, yes, Luke and I, we had a relationship and I confided some things to him and he knows some things about me. But now it's like he's insinuating that he knows me better than anyone, which is total crap!"

Nathan didn't say anything. He sat there, inwardly knowing that what she had just said was her way of trying to convince herself it was true. He knew that she'd never opened up to anyone like she had with Lucas. He knew from the couple times he'd seen her with Evan that this guy didn't know her like Lucas did. He just didn't feel like having his head chewed off right now, so he didn't say a word.

"OK, Nathan, what?" she asked, irritation in her voice.

"What?" he asked, raising his hands defensively.

"You have that look! That look you get when you want to say something but you're not sure if you should," she said.

He inhaled deeply to buy some time and choose his words carefully.

"Do you remember the first time we came here?" he asked gently. Her head snapped to look at him. "I know you do. I hated him that night, and not only because he beat me. That was the night I knew you were into him. It took me all of 30 seconds to notice the way you two looked at each other," he admitted. He'd never told her that before.

"Nate, that was a long time ago," she sighed.

"Yeah, Peyton, it was. But you know what? When I met Evan, I wanted to see that look in your eye when you looked at him. But it's not there, is it?" he asked, the intensity growing in his voice. "As much as I'm pissed at Luke for taking so damn long realizing that he wants you, he still realized it. He's still in love with you, Peyton."

"So he says," she replied quietly.

"I know that you love Evan. But can you honestly tell me that he knows you like Lucas does? Can you honestly tell me that Lucas isn't still in your heart somewhere?" he asked, turning to look at her. Her eyes met his and there was so much uncertainty there that even he could see it.

"Maybe it was a mistake. Coming back here," she said looking out over the water.

"Or maybe it's the best decision you've made in years," he pointed out, bumping his shoulder to hers, then throwing an arm around her and pulling her into him.

She let out a deep breath and the two just sat there looking across to the town they grew up in, and did her best to convince herself that Nathan wasn't right.

--

Peyton was due to have dinner with Brooke and Mouth, who themselves were becoming suspiciously close, at Brooke's house. The three of them chatted and ate and laughed over old times, while Peyton gave what details she could about her upcoming wedding. The more she talked about it, the more she realized she hadn't done very much at all. Brooke quickly changed the subject when she noticed the look on Peyton's face change from happy and excited, to completely overwhelmed.

After spending the last few days thinking about Peyton and their last encounter, Lucas knew that he had to talk to her. He was convinced when Nathan told him that she'd asked him to talk, and that he sensed and uncertainty with her. The best news he'd heard in years was his brother telling him that he thought Peyton still had feelings for him somewhere inside her. He knew had to apologize to her for how he'd acted and, more importantly, he had to stop her from making this mistake. He'd tried everything, and knew that there were no more words he could say that would make her change her mind, but he was sure as hell going to try. He wasn't about to sit still and let his world fall apart around him without a fight. She was going to hear what he had to say if he had shout it from the rooftops.

In the middle of a conversation over coffee about Mouth and Peyton's disco routine at the masquerade party all those years ago, there was a knock at the door. Brooke stood from the couch to answer the door, the three of them were shocked to see Lucas on the other side of the door. His eyes went immediately to Peyton as she sat on the couch with her legged tucked underneath her.

"Luke, what are you doing here?" she asked, standing and attempting to remain calm.

"You can't marry him. OK?" he started. Brooke and Mouth shared a worried look as he strode past them and towards the woman he was talking to. "Because I love you. I could go into a long drawn out speech about the first time we met, or talk about all the significant events in each others' lives that we've experienced together. But all you need to know is that I'm in love with you, Peyton. I'm in love with you."

"Lucas, don't do this," she pleaded, closing her eyes and shaking her head at him.

"I have to!" he said, in a desperate whisper. "I can't stop loving you, and I can't stop fighting for you until you give me a reason to."

"I'm marrying someone else!" she said angrily. "How is that not a good enough reason?"

"Luke, maybe you should go," Brooke offered delicately.

"Brooke, it's fine. Can you guys just...just give us a minute, OK?" she said, looking to her friends, indicating it was alright for them to leave the two alone, and Brooke and Mouth headed for the balcony. "Lucas, I can't do this anymore."

"Do what?" he asked. "Be near me?"

"Yes! There's too much history and I don't want to forget that, OK? But I also don't want to relive it," she explained.

"I don't think that's it," he said smugly.

"What?"

"I think you can't be near me because you feel the same things I do. It's still there, Peyt. You and me," he said, reaching for her hand. "Wearing someone else's ring won't make that go away."

"Lucas..." She attempted to speak, but was stopped when his lips pressed against hers. He pulled her closer to him with his hands on her hips before she pushed him away.

"Stop doing that!" she said harshly. "Stop kissing me! Stop talking to me. Just...Stop."

"I'm not going to stop until you realize what I have known all along," he said, looking intensely into her green eyes. "We're supposed to be together."

"I'm going to marry him, Lucas."

"We'll see," he said with a grin. "'Night, Peyton." He opened the door and once he was on the other side, he closed his eyes tightly and took as deep a breath as his lungs would allow. It was out of his hands. He'd done what he could. That realization alone was enough to make his eyes well with tears. She may not come back to him, and he had nothing left to draw from.

She was left standing in the living room of Brooke's house, completely in shock at how confident he was. He was seriously in denial about the situation, she thought. How could he possibly think that she was going to change her mind over night? She raised her hand to her lips, where she could still feel the sensation of his kiss lingering. It still felt like it had the first time they kissed...

"Everything OK?" Mouth asked as he and Brooke walked back into the house.

Peyton glanced at Brooke, whose face held a knowing look. They'd been here before. Brooke had seen that look before. It was always going to be Lucas and Peyton, and the brunette finally felt like her best friend might be realizing that too.

"I don't know," Peyton said with a blank expression.

--

After yet another encounter at her house, Brooke knew she had to talk to Lucas. She wanted to make sure he was OK, but she also wanted to let him know that she saw a shift in Peyton. Something he'd said to her - maybe a few things - had changed her attitude after he interrupted their dinner.

She tapped gently on the kitchen door of his home, and turned the knob before she heard a response from the other side. She smiled gently as she saw him sitting at his kitchen table with a cup of coffee, typing away on his computer. He looked up from the screen to smile at her.

"Hi," he said softly, almost as though he was embarrassed. "Brooke, I'm really sorry about last night."

"It's OK," she said. "I just thought I'd come make sure you're alright."

"Why wouldn't I be?" he asked genuinely.

"Lucas, you forget how well I know you," she teased as she sat in the chair across from him. "I know this has all been really hard on you."

He smiled weakly and shook his head. "It's like she's forgotten about me. Like she pushed me out of her head and her heart because of how everything happened."

"She hasn't forgotten, Luke, she just doesn't know how to remember" Brooke said.

"What?" he asked, letting out a confused laugh.

Brooke sighed, trying to think of a way to explain it so that it made sense. "She doesn't know how to remember you and the way things used to be without going through it all again. She knows the connection is still there, and I think that terrifies her."

Lucas looked into the mug in front of him. "I guess I can understand that."

"She doesn't want to forget about you. She just thinks she has to so that her heart isn't conflicted. She pushed it all away so she could ignore that it was still there," she said, reaching for his hand.

"What do I do if she doesn't come back to me, Brooke?" he asked with an air of desperation in his voice.

"She will," Brooke insisted.

"How can you be so sure?" he asked. "She's getting married in like, a week. And I don't know what to do any more. It's all too...final. Like, if she marries this guy, it's really over."

"OK, you need to stop," Brooke said harshly. "Stop feeling sorry for yourself, and stop thinking that she doesn't feel it too. She does. You just have to give her enough time to figure that out. Let her be without you for a bit and she'll realize she can't do it."

"She's had three years without me, Brooke. I think your strategy is flawed," he replied with a slight amount of sarcasm.

"She didn't know you still loved her, though," Brooke said, kinking an eyebrow and flashing her dimples. "You think that doesn't mean something to her?"

He pursed his lips and sighed. "Why are you helping me?" he asked.

"Because if you two idiots can't work it out, I don't know who can. And I really need to believe that a love like yours exists," she said, pausing briefly to let her words sink in. "A love that will not alter," she said with a wink, making him smile.

"What about you and Mouth?" he asked teasingly. "You guys have been a long time coming."

"Shut up! We're..."

"Do _not_ say friends. You and him are not just friends." He tilted his head slightly, indicating that he knew she would be lying if she tried to convince him that they were.

"Whatever," she said as she stood from her chair. "I'm going to leave you to brood alone."

"I wasn't brooding!" he shouted.

"You were brooding! It's like, the only think you know how to do," she teased, grabbing the door knob. "Bye Lucas."

"Bye Brooke. And thank you," he said with a genuine smile. She winked again and closed the door behind her.

If her best friend saw it, Lucas had to believe that Peyton was feeling what he hoped she would. Brooke had always been more than intuitive to the blonde had felt. In fact, it lead to their own breakup. He knew that Brooke wouldn't have said a word to him about it if she wasn't completely sure. He knew she was right. He had to give Peyton the time and space to miss him. He'd let her know that he was waiting for her if and when she came to her senses, and now he had to let her figure out what was in her own heart. He just hoped it would be him.

--

After her strange and intense evening at Brooke's, Peyton decided to stay in her house - and more specifically, her room - the entire next day. She didn't turn on her computer or answer her phone when it rang. She listened to music and sketched and ventured from her room only when she was hungry enough to trudge down the stairs.

After dinner, she made a pot of coffee and had a mug in her hand when she settled back in at the desk in her room, Pink Floyd filling the silence, and began to draw. She didn't know what compelled her to do it, but she drew the familiar park by the river. The asphalt and hoops, the bleachers, the buildings on the other side of the running water. She drew a crowd of people and two boys battling on the court as she watched on, conflicted by who she should cheer for. She stood on the sidelines at half court with her hands in her pockets as people cheered around her. A dark haired boy was sending a shot towards the basket as a light haired boy was jumping to block him.

She was so focused on her drawing that she didn't hear anyone come into her house and walk into her room.

"Reminiscing?" Brooke said as she lingered over Peyton's shoulder.

"Jeez!" Peyton said, clutching her heart after being startled. "You scared the crap out of me!"

"Sorry," Brooke said with a shrug, sitting at the foot of the bed. "I knocked but you didn't answer.

"Yeah," Peyton said, placing the cap on the marker in her hand. "Sorry about last night."

"Don't be sorry. I would have disappeared after that too," Brooke chuckled.

"God, I don't know why he can't just let it go!" she said angrily.

"Umm," Brooke started, "You mean instead of drawing how it all began?" She flinched, waiting for a verbal assault from her best friend.

"What are you talking about?" Peyton asked.

"Please! That night? That one on one game? That's where it started. That's what changed everything," Brooke explained.

"It's just a drawing, Brooke," Peyton insisted.

"Right. And his novel is just a bunch of words. And Haley's music is a few random thoughts thrown together," she said, staring at her friend skeptically. "It's not just a drawing, Peyton."

"I'm getting married," Peyton said, and saw Brooke roll her eyes.

"So, is he taking the place of Nathan in this little scenario?" Brooke asked, pointing to the page on Peyton's lap. When her statement was met with a kinked brow, she continued. "Note how the blonde is blocking the shot."

"Brooke, you know I love you," Peyton said. "But can you please just say what you want to say?"

"You won't like it," Brooke forewarned.

"You are my best friend, so if you have something to tell me, then tell me," Peyton persisted.

Brooke took a deep breath, knowing that what she said next would elicit a harsh reaction.

"I think that you are hiding with Evan and that you still love Lucas and you're making a huge mistake if you go through with this wedding," Brooke said quickly in one breath.

"What?" Peyton said, dumbfounded.

"I really like Evan, OK? But he's not Lucas. And I saw the way you looked at Luke last night when he said he loved you and I have never seen you look that way once since the last time you and him were a couple." Brooke's eyes searched Peyton's for any kind of reaction, but found only shock. Had Brooke and Nathan compared notes? They were saying the same things. "Peyton, I will support you no matter what, you know that. I'm on your side. But I don't want you to have to live with regret and that feeling of not knowing what could have been."

Peyton just sat, staring at the page on her lap, quietly contemplating its significance and Brooke's words, and wondering if everyone else was right and she was the only one who couldn't see it.

"I love Evan," she said softly.

"I don't doubt that you do," Brooke said.

"I just...Everything was fine when we were in L.A. Then I come back to Tree Hill and it's like - this place _is_ Lucas. This place is Lucas and Peyton. And I'm here and I wonder how we ever even broke up in the first place." A tear started to roll down her cheek. "Then I feel guilty for even thinking about him at all, because I have this wonderful man who's ready to offer me everything Lucas didn't."

"Peyton, I hate to break it to you, but he offered. He was too stupid to hear what you were saying, but he wanted that with you," Brooke said. Peyton's eyes met Brooke's and the two sat in silence for a few moments before Peyton looked down to her lap again.

"I just keep thinking...what if I said yes three years ago," she said softly. Brooke stood and walked so she was standing behind her friend, and wrapped her arms around her so her chin was resting on Peyton's shoulder.

"P. Sawyer, everything happens for a reason," Brooke said, making Peyton let out a quick sigh.

"What do I do? I messed everything up. I love Evan but I just...can't let go of Lucas," Peyton finally admitted.

"Can't? Or won't?" Brooke asked, removing her arms from around the blonde. "If it's both, then maybe you have your answer."

"Maybe," Peyton said in a whisper.

--


	7. Chapter 7

It seemed all Peyton had done since she returned to Tree Hill was sleep and cry, and that night she'd done a bizarre mix of both. She'd wake up to a damp pillow before falling back to sleep, but she was restless all night long.

She was laying awake in her bed and there was a knock on the door. She didn't care who it was. She had no intention of answering, but whoever it was, was not relenting, so she quickly threw a robe around herself and trudged down the stairs.

She flung the door open, fully prepared to yell at whoever was standing on her doorstep. She hadn't expected to see Evan, Nathan, Haley and Brooke in front of her.

"Evan!" she said, running into his open arms. "What the hell is going on?" she asked, looking at Nathan.

"Evan called me yesterday and said he needed us to meet here this morning. He said for all of us to come," he explained.

"What are you doing here? I thought you had to stay in L.A. for another week!" she asked her fiancée, ushering her friends into her living room.

"Missed you too much," he said with a grin. It was met by an eye roll from Peyton. "I couldn't let you stay here alone and pull this wedding together in such a short amount of time."

"What about work?" she asked.

"They understood," he said simply.

"OK, what is with that stupid grin that you have plastered on your face?!" she asked

"I um...I wanted to tell you with your friends here..." he said.

"What, Evan!? You're freaking me out," she pleaded for an answer.

"I bought a house!"

"What?!" she shouted. "You _have_ a house! What are you talking about?"

"I bought a house here. In Tree Hill. At the beach!" He was visibly excited.

"Evan, we live in _Malibu_! We do not need a beach house!" Peyton was suddenly very aware that all she was wearing was a robe over her sleep shorts and tank top, and wrapped her arms around her midsection.

"I figure this can be our vacation home. Or maybe someday our permanent home. Peyton, I see how you are here. You're more relaxed and comfortable. There's something here that has that effect on you," he said, reaching out for her wrist, which she pulled away.

Brooke, Haley, and Nathan exchanged nervous looks. They knew what, or rather who, made her that calm and comfortable person, even when he was being a complete jackass. They also felt this was a conversation they shouldn't be witnessing.

"Peyton," Haley interrupted softly, "we're gonna go."

"No, you guys, you really don't have to," Peyton said, turning to face her friends. "I just have to figure out how my lawyer boyfriend can find a way to get a refund on a freaking house!"

"Boyfriend?" Evan muttered, slowly raising his head to meet Peyton's eyes.

"We're going," Brooke insisted, grabbing Haley's arm, and throwing Peyton a glance that was part of their secret language. It said_ 'you have to figure it out'._ Nathan pursed his lips and nodded towards the arguing couple. _Poor guy_, he thought. As soon as they heard the door shut, they heard the yelling.

"You just called me your boyfriend!" he said, anger apparent in his voice.

"Evan, we've been engaged for less than a month. It was force of habit," she rationalized.

"No. There's something you're not telling me. You've been distant since you came back here, and you're not even happy that I came to surprise you," he said, dejectedly.

"Evan, I am happy," she said, but he still wouldn't look at her. "Hey," she said, placing her hands on his face. "I'm happy. I just didn't expect you to buy a house without talking to me about it first. You have a perfectly fine one, in the city where we actually need to live."

"You mean we have a perfectly fine house," he corrected her.

"Well, it's your house, I just live there with you," she said with a grin. That's secretly how she'd always felt.

"Peyton, that's our house. Not mine. And I thought that you'd want to be able to visit here more often and see your friends and your dad."

"It's a wonderful gesture, Evan, it is. But one that was a bit drastic. We can stay here when we visit. And this is the first time I've been home in four years," she explained.

"You consider this place your home?" he asked.

"OK, you are overanalyzing everything I'm saying," she said, sitting next to him and placing a hand on his knee. He covered it with his. "I just meant home as in - where I grew up. Like L.A. is home for you."

"I really thought you'd be happy about it. It's a beautiful place," he said sadly.

"Evan, I'm happy if you're happy. If you think we need another house, then we'll keep it. We can rent it out or something when we aren't here. It's a good investment. I'm happy," she said again, hoping to convince him. And herself. "So are you going to show me this place, or what?"

A smile spread across his face. "Not wearing that," he replied, pointing at her robe. She playfully hit his arm and ran up to her room to change.

She briefly wondered how she could be two totally different people in two separate cities. In L.A., she was all business. Fun business, but business nonetheless. In Tree Hill, she was quiet and pensive and creative and, dare she say, broody. And yet, she felt like there was something missing in L.A. that she had in Tree Hill, and she couldn't put her finger on it. It wasn't Lucas. It was a feeling or a mood or an aura.

The climbed into his rental car and made their way towards the beach.

"We should be there any second. 1522..." he said, his eyes reading house numbers and glancing at the address on the piece of paper in front of him as he drove.

"Wait," she said, turning to him, "you bought this place sight unseen?" She felt the anger boiling up in her again, but reminded herself that he had done this for her. He only wanted to make her happy.

"The realtor was great. Trust me, Peyton," he said, stealing a glance at her. "Ah! That's it!"

The house was beautiful. It was white with red shutters and large wrap around porch. There were three stories, each with their own balconies. It was way bigger than they would ever need, especially for a second home. Evan jumped out of the car, excited to show her the interior of the house, and Peyton plastered on a fake smile as he turned the key to the front door. He gave her a tour of the house, pointing out which room they'd use for what. There were five bedrooms, four bathrooms, a hot tub, a fully renovated kitchen...It was all too much. She was speechless as she wondered what in the world made him think that they needed this house. And what made him think that she'd want it.

"I have another surprise," he whispered as she stood on the back porch looking at the ocean.

"Evan, I have had enough surprises for one day," she said honestly.

"It's in your name," he said, placing a hand on her hip.

"What?!" she asked, perhaps a little too loudly.

"It's all yours, sweetie. This house is yours," he said with a smile as she turned to face him. "Of course, we'll have to change the paperwork after the wedding to reflect your new last name, but that's easy enough."

New last name. She had never even considered taking his last name. Not once. Not in two years had she doodled on a note pad, _Peyton Vanguard_. There were only three last names, other than Sawyer, that she'd ever considered having. Grohl, Jagielski, and Scott. And only one of those was she ever truly serious about.

"Right," she said softly, looking down at his chest and playing with one of the buttons of his shirt. "We haven't talked about that, have we?" _Add it to the list of things_, she thought.

"No, but I just assumed..." he said, rubbing her arms with his hands. "I mean, I thought you'd want my last name."

"I never really thought about it," she said quietly, her eyes meeting his. "I feel like my name is my only bond to my mom."

"She's your mom, honey, why do you need the name Sawyer to be bonded to her?" he asked.

She knew the confusion and hurt flashed across her face, but she couldn't stop it, and maybe she didn't want to. He clearly did not understand the situation. Actually, she thought maybe he didn't understand her. At all. He'd grown up with both parents, together, until they passed. They each had cancer and were gone within two years of each other. He'd just lost his mother when Peyton met him. He'd always been aware of her situation, and she thought he knew how she felt about everything, but it was obvious that he didn't have a clue. She couldn't find words to say to him. She just let him wrap his arms around her, and they stood there, with him feeling like everything was fine, and her feeling like she'd never been more off balance.

They stopped for lunch and strolled through downtown, then drove back to her house, and she barely said two words to him. He'd bought her a house. He'd fallen in love with her and offered her everything he could and tried his best to make her happy. And maybe she was, on some level. But being in Tree Hill just reminded her of everything she'd left behind. Friendships that actually meant something. Family, or what she had left of it. Her sense of self. Accomplishment that others recognized and applauded her for.

Love.

Once inside the door, she made up an excuse about having to meet up with an old friend for dinner. It was a lie. She'd never truly lied to him before, but for some reason, it seemed like the only way to get away from him. That alone made her feel awful. She hadn't seen him for days, and she still couldn't' wait to escape him. That wasn't a good sign.

She left him laying on the couch in her living room. When she closed the door behind her, she suddenly felt like she could breathe again. She felt like there had been a weight on her since he'd arrived that morning, and she'd finally put it down.

She started walking. She walked, listening to the sounds of the small town as they played around her. She walked past the empty River Court, and past where her favourite record store used to be. She walked until she came to the place that she hadn't realized was her destination until she got there.


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N:** The response to this story has been amazing! Thanks for the reviews and alerts. I hope I don't disappoint!

**--**

She didn't know what brought her here. Maybe it was confusion or hope or need, but she was here nonetheless, and feeling like this was the only place in the world right now that she could possibly feel safe and comfortable and normal. It was almost as if she knew she'd find the answers she was looking for, just by being here.

She took a deep breath gently tapped on the glass pane of the door. She heard the unmistakable rustling of papers and the door opened, revealing him in a tee shirt and jeans, hair in disarray, and surprise on his face.

"Peyton. Hi," he managed.

"Hey Luke," she choked out softly. The two stood for a moment, just looking at each other, until he realized she was still on the other side of the door.

"Come in, sorry. I just...I wasn't expecting you," he said, and immediately kicked himself for it. Since she'd gotten back into town, every little noise he heard, in his head, was her coming to see him. Every time he went anywhere, he hoped to see her, just for the sake of _seeing_ her. He felt like a teenager again, stealing glances at the girl he had a crush on. Of course, now it was more than a crush. But it was the same girl, and she elicited the same feelings.

"No, I'm sorry. I don't know why I'm here. I just...started walking and found myself on your doorstep," she said, taking a seat on his bed.

"Are you OK? You look like you've seen a ghost." His voice was laced with concern.

She chuckled. "Maybe just the ghost of the girl I used to be."

He tilted his head in confusion and sat next to her.

"Evan is here," she said, looking at her hands. "He flew in this morning."

"Oh," was all he could say.

"He said he missed me and that he wanted to help me with the wedding stuff," she explained. She still wouldn't look at him.

Her words were killing him. _He_ missed her. _He_ wanted to plan a wedding with her. He wanted that life with her. And he knew he had no one to blame but himself for not having that life.

"That's good, right?" he asked, though it took everything in him to do it.

"He bought me a house, Lucas. Here. At the beach. It's huge and gorgeous and I...I don't want it," she finally admitted. And once again, she was admitting something to Lucas that she couldn't for the life of her admit to anyone else.

"Wow. That's tough competition," he joked, and he heard her laugh slightly. "Why don't you want it?" he asked.

"I don't need a house. I don't need him to buy me things. I don't need extras. I need him to understand me and just..._get_ it." She finally looked at him and he saw the tears pooling in her eyes. "I want him to get it. I want him to know that I need 15 minutes alone after I come home from work. That I don't like him calling me 'sweetie'. And that I hate that stupid flavoured coffee milk stuff he buys. And that I'll read the same book over and over again because it still speaks to me every time..."

"_To Kill a Mockingbird_," he interrupted with a grin, recalling her hands on the battered cover as she lay sleeping with it resting on her stomach.

She closed her eyes and smiled for the first time since she got to his house. "Yes."

"So why don't you tell him that?" he asked. He didn't know why he did it. Why would he try to send her back to the man he knew was wrong for her? Maybe it was because he wanted her to realize it. Or maybe it was because he just wanted her to be happy. With or without him.

"I have tried. He doesn't understand," she said. He watched a tear finally roll down her cheek, and it was all he could do not to reach out and wipe it away. Instead he reached for a tissue and handed it to her. "He wants me to change my last name," she said, implying that she had no intentions of doing it.

"Oh," he said. "But you always said...I mean, when we were together, you said you'd..."

"That was different," she interrupted, but immediately, she didn't know why she'd said it. How was it different? Why was it? He didn't dare ask. She needed a friend right now, and starting an argument over things from the past wouldn't help, as much as he desperately wanted to know.

"OK. So why don't you want to take his last name?" he asked gently. "What _is_ his last name?"

"It's Vanguard," she said. "I feel like having the last name Sawyer keeps me close to my mom."

"I can understand that." He wasn't sure how he'd done it, but he'd managed not to touch her yet. But he wanted to. Badly.

"I knew you would," she said softly. Of all people who would get it, Lucas would. In a matter of only a few minutes, she was convinced that he knew her better than Evan ever would.

They sat in silence for a while. It must have been five minutes before she looked at him again, offering a weak smile as if to thank him for just being there for her to talk to. It broke his heart to see her so conflicted and hurting. Then thought that this was what she must have been like after he left, and that pained him even more. Thinking of her, alone in a city away from her friends, going through a break up must have been the most terrible thing. It was terrible for him and he had his home and his friends. She had no one.

"Peyton, earlier, you said you saw the ghost of who you used to be," he stated. "What did you mean by that?"

"I just...I miss that girl," she admitted.

"So do I," he said, making her smile again.

"I was fearless then, Luke."

"So what happened to her?" he asked.

"She had her heart broken," she replied, closing her eyes when she realized what she'd said and to whom. "Sorry."

"No. Don't be," he insisted. "I am the sorry one, Peyton. Trust me."

She turned to look at him, offering a weak smile. She did trust him. She had always trusted him. He'd never given her reason not to. Even after everything they'd been through, it dawned on her that she trusted him more than anyone.

"Almost every night I have this dream," he started. "We're back in that hotel room in L.A. and I ask you to marry me." Her green eyes met his and she knew he could see everything in them - in her. "And every single time I tell you that I'd wait for you forever if I had to."

"Lucas..."

"I want you to know that I know how badly I hurt you, OK? Because I killed myself when I did that. I thought the worst pain in the world was hearing you say no to me. But that was nothing compared to knowing that I couldn't take back what I did." His eyes were full of sadness when she looked at them.

"God, Luke. How did things get so messed up?" she asked, closing her eyes and shaking her head.

"Is that rhetorical?" he asked, jokingly.

"I don't know what to do, Lucas," she said. She let a sob escape and the sound of it nearly killed him. "I feel so disconnected from myself and I don't know how I let it get this far."

He finally couldn't help himself any longer and he grabbed her into his arms and held her while she cried. Her hand clutched the fabric of his shirt on his chest and he pretended he didn't see the sparkle it threw, but the truth was, it nearly blinded him. It was tearing him apart that she was someone else's, but right now, with her in his arms, he didn't care. He didn't care about anyone outside the two of them. This bedroom was like a bubble, shielding them from everything that could tell him that he was wrong to be doing what he was doing.

"I have to tell you something," he said quietly.

"What?" she asked, pulling away from him with worry in her eyes.

"I did call you. 2 years ago when I was in L.A. I called you the morning of my book signing," he admitted.

"What?" she repeated, not believing what she was hearing.

"I called you and some guy answered. Matt," he said.

"Matt is my assistant," she explained, closing her eyes in disbelief.

"What?" he asked.

"He's my assistant. I leave my cell with him so it doesn't drive me nuts during the day..." her voice trailed.

"I thought he was your...I mean..." he couldn't get out the words.

"Oh my God," she said, another tear rolling down her cheek. "You called."

"I called," he said softly.

"I'm feeling like this because of a misunderstanding," she said, convinced of the fact.

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"Lucas, if you had called me. I mean, if I had known you had called...Things would be different. They could be different, right?" she asked timidly, her eyes pleading for an answer.

"I don't know," he admitted. "I always hoped so."

They sat for a while, with her hand laying in his unintentionally, and contemplated what their lives would be like if she'd just answered her own damned cell phone.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, pulling him into a hug.

"You have nothing to be sorry for," he said, placing his hand on the back of her neck.

"You've been so sad and hurting and it's all my fault," she said.

"No, Peyton, it's my fault. Trust me, I know it's my fault," he said, pulling away to look into those beautiful green eyes of hers. "I know it's my fault."

He somehow resisted the urge to kiss her. How had they ever grown apart when it was clear they were so connected?

"Luke," she whispered, looking down at her lap, "will you lay with me for a bit?"

"Peyt, I don't think..."

"Please, Luke. Just...please," she said. She knew he could see the need in her eyes. The need to just _be_. To lay with him, feeling his heartbeat and be wrapped in his comfort. He'd never been able to say no to her. Never once since he'd known her.

He nodded moved to lay his head on the pillow, and she curled up alongside him, resting her leg slightly on top of his. He gently stroked her hair while she drew circles on his chest. She hadn't felt as intimate with someone as she did in that moment, since the night they slept in their clothes before...before everything went bad.

"What am I gonna do, Luke?" she asked so quietly he almost couldn't hear her.

"I don't know, baby," he admitted. "I can't tell you that."

She fell asleep in his arms and he lay there listening to her breathe, and his heart ached for everything he didn't have with her. Sure, he had her here now, in his arms. But why? She'd come to him seeking comfort from the pain someone else had caused. When they were in high school that was almost all their relationship was before they both finally came to their senses. But now, that wasn't enough for him. It wasn't enough to be the one she turned to when she needed someone to lean on. If he couldn't be that person consistently, then what was he doing? She'd get married and go back to L.A. and he'd be left in Tree Hill, still in love with her, and knowing that she was with someone who couldn't make her as happy as she deserved to be.

After about an hour, she stirred and wiped her eye with her index finger. She looked over and smiled at him. He smiled back.

"You should probably get back, huh?" he asked.

"Yeah, I should," she replied.

"Before you go, take this," he said, reaching to his bedside table and offering her a few typed pages.

"What is this?" she asked, taking them in her hands and standing from the bed.

"Something I'm working on," he said with a grin.

"You're writing again?" she asked, a wide smile on her face. He nodded. "Luke, I told you!"

"Yeah, you did."

They stood somewhat awkwardly, neither knowing what to do next.

"I don't know what to say, Lucas...I was - am - a mess and you are...you're...," she stopped stuttering when she saw the grin on his face. "Thank you."

"It's OK. I'm here," he said. She knew he meant that he would be there, waiting for her, if and when she ever needed him. He hugged her once more, and put everything he had into it. He didn't know when he'd be able to do it again, and he wanted to memorize how she felt pressed against him. Every time he put his arms around her and hers around him, it was like there was an unspoken bond there. Trust and comfort and love that didn't need to be spoken. It just was.

She pulled away and smiled at him, then turned to walk out the door.

He didn't say goodbye. He didn't want to, for fear that it actually would be.


	9. Chapter 9

Evan was sleeping in her bed when she returned home, and she stood in the doorway just watching his chest rise and fall with each breath he took. She truly did love this man. He was perfect for her. He'd given her so many things and pulled her from the darkness. But she knew in her heart that she couldn't marry him. She couldn't do that to either of them. She knew what happened when people got married when they knew they shouldn't. Dan and Deb. Granted, she liked to think she'd never be in a situation that extreme, but she wasn't about to take chances. She knew that she owed it to him to let him go and find someone he couldn't live without. And she knew that she owed it to herself to not be trapped in a situation while secretly wanting someone else.

She dropped her bag on the floor and set the papers she was still holding on her bedside table. She lay down next to him for what she knew would be the last time, and put her arm over his midsection. His hand, somehow even though he was sleeping, found its way to hers.

She lay there for a while, thinking of everything that had happened in the short amount of time since she'd been back. All the turning points and highs and lows and revelations. Somewhere amongst the thoughts running through her head, she realized what Tree Hill had that she hadn't been able to find anywhere else.

Truth.

She woke up in the morning to him breathing irregularly as he sat next to her. She immediately sat up and looked over to him and saw his face. He was...she didn't know. There was an emotion there that she'd never seen before. But she knew it wasn't good. Then she saw what was in his hands. The pages Lucas had given her.

"Evan," she said. Her voice sounded pitiful even to her.

"I don't know why, but I thought Lucas didn't live here any more. You haven't introduced me or mentioned him. I just figured he was gone," he said calmly. He did not look at her as she stared at him. "Then I find this," he said, holding up the pages, "and I realize that not only did you not tell me he was around, but you've been seeing him."

"Evan..."

"And he's still in love with you." He finally looked at her and put the pages in her hands aggressively and got up from the bed. "I read the first book, and I know what he said. I just didn't think it was still true. I guess that was really naive of me."

"I don't even know what these pages say. I thought we could just avoid him and then we'd go back to L.A. and we'd just...be us," she said. She didn't want it to end this way.

"You lied to me, Peyton. You said you were over him, and then we come back here and you're like a high school girl. You're moody and distant. That's not you!"

"That IS me! That's what I'm like. This is who I am!" she shouted back. She resented him for insinuating she was acting like a child, and also for not realizing that this was the real her - though she'd never truly let him see this side of herself.

"I thought we were past this. I know when we first met you were still dealing with it, but come on, Peyton. It's been three years. This is verging on pathetic," he said. He was just being plain mean.

"What's pathetic, Evan? That I have a past? Or that I'm trying to force myself into marrying someone who has no clue who I am?" she asked. He met her eyes with a cold glare.

"OK, are you trying to be a bitch, or is that just part of the old you?" he asked bitterly.

"Well you're making it pretty easy," she spat back.

"You know? I think I've been fighting this since...for as long as I've known you. But it's so black and white to me now that you are _still_ in _love_ with him," he said, resolved to the fact. "I'm so in love with you - more than I think you realize. And the sad thing is that I'm jealous of the guy who broke you. So, you know? Maybe I'm the pathetic one." he said, walking past her and out of her room.

She stared at the papers in her hands, unwilling to let them go and so desperate to read what they said. So she ran after him still clutching the pages.

"Evan, please. Can we just talk?" she pleaded. She knew they were over, but she didn't want it to end like this. She wasn't going to fight for him, but she didn't want him to hate her either.

"Peyton, we can't. It's done," he said once he reached the living room. He turned to look at her and she saw the sadness and defeat on his face. "Maybe I was stupid to not believe that the Lucas and Peyton from the book would eventually work it out."

They stood like that for a few moments, looking at each other and knowing it would be for the last time. She knew breakups were like this - with one or more people crying and both trying to act like they were OK, when they each knew that they were cracking on the inside.

She looked down to her hands still clutching Lucas' pages, and slid the ring off her finger. "You should..um...find someone who deserves this," she said, reaching out to give him back the diamond. She realized that she was more attached to the now crumpled pages she was holding, than she ever was to that ring.

"You do deserve it, Peyton," he said softly, grabbing her hand as he grabbed the ring. "You're _my_ Lucas," he said softly, trying to choke back his emotions.

He turned from her and grabbed his bags and walked towards her, placing a lingering kiss on her cheek and whispering goodbye in her ear. She didn't watch him leave. She couldn't watch him leave. She just heard the door close and the car pull away and knew he was gone. She wiped her cheeks and unfolded the pages in her hands, her eyes clouded by tears, but still able to read the words. The last page of the few was the hardest to read. Her eyes were sore, and tears had dropped on the words in front of her.

_He remembers the first time he ever saw her. All skinny arms, and tangled mess of hair. There was a kindness about her that she tried to hide, but he could see it in those eyes of hers. Behind all the anger and pain and confusion, she was just a girl. A girl with a heart that, while scarred and guarded, was beautiful and honest. It was hard letting her go. It was hard losing her. It's still really hard. _

_Our lives are defined by the choices we make. The paths we choose to follow, and the manner in which we travel down these roads. You can follow what could have been; be bitter and remorseful, and end up regretting a life wasted by casting your eyes on the rear view mirror rather than the road ahead. You can move forward in the positive; forget all the pain and heartache and loneliness. You can trade it in for the unknown and take it all in as you pass it. The destination? No one knows until they arrive. Maybe it's life. Maybe it's love. But are those not one in the same? Are we not just going through the motions until we have someone who can bring feeling? Someone who can bring life?_

_He follows what could have been. But he follows it forward, and he does it with a longing and a passion that he cannot explain. He has regrets, yes. But they are there to remind him of what he's had, and what he can have again if he just continues. Keeps trying. Keeps running toward life. Is she there? Is she next to him? Maybe not in body. But he carries her with him everywhere he goes and in everything he does. She's in his heart as he makes his choices. He tries to live the way he thinks she'd want him to._

_He believes with everything in him that someday she'll return. She'll come and stand in front of him and say his name and his heart will race at the sight of her. And when that happens, he wants to be a version of himself that she'll love. One that she'd want him to be. For when she returns, he'll have found life again. He'll come out of the fog that's surrounded him since he made the mistakes he made, and what will be standing in front of him, is her. She will reawaken his heart and the feelings of love he'd felt so long in vain. The presence of her will move him._

She was crying harder now, but jammed her feet into her shoes and ran out the door, with only the tattered papers and her keys in her hand. So many emotions were coursing through her that she didn't know what she was feeling at all. It was almost as if the emotions cancelled each other out and she felt nothing. She both loved and hated Lucas. She felt terrible for Evan when he'd done nothing wrong other than try to love her. Sh felt like 10 different people all at once. She started running through the town. She was sure that onlookers would think she was crazy - clutching his words and her cheeks stained with tears. But she started running. She was running towards the River Court, not even sure he'd be there, but it's where he'd always gone when he wanted her to find him.

She saw from afar that there was a pick up game happening. As she drew closer, she recognized Nathan's SUV and assumed Lucas would also be there. As she made her way closer, Skills was the first to notice her.

She was blonde hair and fury as she made her way towards him. They were all a little scared of what was about to happen, so Nathan, Skills, Junk, Fergie, and Mouth all stepped back while Lucas stepped forward to meet her as she stepped onto the court.

"You did this! You made him leave me!" she yelled, hitting him in the chest with her forearms, her hands balled up in fists.

The rest of the guys looked on, confused and a little scared of what they were witnessing. Of course, it was obvious that Evan had left, but couldn't comprehend why it was Lucas' fault.

"I did?!" he asked, trying to defend himself and calm her simultaneously.

"You made me doubt him, and me! You made him see that I'm still in love with you!" She broke down and stopped punching him and just melted into his chest. She yelled at him with the need to blame someone.

He tentatively put his arms around her, and began stroking her arm with his hand. He didn't say anything out of fear that the words she'd said were ones she didn't mean. She said she was in love with him.

Their friends were watching the scene unfold before them from about 25 feet away, completely unsure of what the hell was actually going on.

"She's either gonna kick his ass, or they're gonna get a room," Skills said, making everyone laugh as quietly as they could.

"Peyton," Lucas said softly. "What happened?"

"This," she said, holding up the pages.

"I don't under..." he began.

"Evan read it before I could. He left," she said, cutting him off and sobbing into his sweaty tee shirt.

"I'm sorry," he said, putting his arms around her again.

"No you're not!" she shouted, pulling away. "You wanted this to happen."

He looked at her for a few moments, confused and not sure what to say. He wanted to tell her that yes, he had wanted it to happen. He wanted her all to himself. He wanted everything with her. But he knew this wasn't the time or place. They didn't need an audience.

"We need to talk," he said, looking into her eyes. It terrified him that he saw nothing there. Nothing that he recognized was in those green eyes he'd always been able to read. The day before, he'd felt like they were getting somewhere, and now she was furious with him, and he had no clue what to do or say.

The two began walking away from the court, neither bothering to say goodbye to their friends. She kept her distance from him, yet he noticed her reach to wipe her eyes every once in a while. He could understand her being upset about letting go of a two year relationship. They were young and that was still a long time to be with someone. It was longer than she and him had been together. That realization alone made him depressed. She didn't want to talk to him. She wanted anything but. She wanted to cry on his shoulder. She wanted to slap him and scream at him. She wanted to kiss him. She wanted to tell him that she wished she'd run after him when he left. Fought harder. Tried more. Proven that she loved him.

They got to his house and he opened the door, leading her inside and closing it behind them. Before he could even say anything, her arms were around his body and she was holding on for dear life. Her actions caught him off guard and he had to regain his balance before he snaked his arms around her, engulfing her in his frame. He felt her shift her head and plant a few kisses on his neck and collar bone. She was making her way to his jaw line when he pulled away.

"Peyton," he whispered.

"Don't," she demanded, kissing the sensitive space below his ear that only she knew about.

"Peyton!" he said, more forcefully, pushing her away.

"Why?" she asked. "Why can't you just do this for me and make me feel better?"

"Are you hearing yourself?" he asked. "You've been broken up for, what, an hour? And you want to have sex to make yourself feel better. That's not you."

"I don't know who I am," she said softly, breaking down again. She plopped down his bed and put her head in her hands. "I'm lost, Lucas."

"Hey," he said, kneeling in front of her, "you're not lost. You're just hurting."

"No. No!" she insisted shaking her head furiously. "I've been someone that I don't like for two years. And I just realized it, and I don't know how to get back to being who I want to be. I don't know that girl any more." The tears were flowing non stop now, and her chin was quivering as he rested his hands on her knees.

"You're Peyton Sawyer. You're an artist and a friend and a daughter. You're sarcastic and cynical and stubborn as all hell," he said with a smile, making her laugh. "You're beautiful and amazing and not easy to love. But that doesn't mean that I don't." Her eyes met his again. "You know I love you. OK? You know that."

"I know," she barely whispered. She placed her hands on his. "I miss you."

"I'm right here," he said, his tone matching hers. He had waited so many nights to hear her say that, and the words hit him harder than he ever imagined. He felt like his chest couldn't contain his heart. He picked up her hand and kissed her knuckles, never taking his eyes off hers. She managed to smile at him through her tears.

She moved herself back onto the bed and curled up, facing away from him, and closed her eyes. He peeled off his shirt, damp with sweat, and tossed it onto a chair. There was nothing more he wanted than to settle himself on top of her and give her what she'd wanted minutes earlier. But he knew better. As much as she wasn't that girl, he wasn't that guy. It would be completely wrong and awful of him to take advantage of her like that. But, he was still a man, and seeing a woman as gorgeous as her laying on his bed, he couldn't help but think about it. She turned her head to look at him as he stood there, shirtless and staring at her.

"Change your mind?" she joked.

"See? Sarcastic," he replied and she smiled. "I'm gonna go..."

"Lay down with me until I figure out what I'm gonna do?" she offered.

He sighed and put his hands on his hips. She finally needed him again, yet he felt like somehow it wasn't real. It wasn't happening, or it wasn't supposed to happen. But so help him, he was going to lay on that bed with her and make it real. He was going to let her cry onto his bare chest until she didn't need to cry any more.

He sat on the bed, his back to her and breathed deeply, closing his eyes. All he could think about was her and how long it would take for them to be 'them' again. It was all he wanted. It was all he'd wanted for the past three years. And now it was right in front of him and there was no way he was going to let it slip away.

As soon as he was horizontal, she moved close to him and put her arm across his body. The tips of her fingers were digging into his rib cage, but he smiled through the pain. She wanted this as badly as he did. He felt the silent tears roll onto his body, and pulled her in closer, though they both knew that they couldn't be any closer to one another than they already were. Neither of them said a word. They just lay there awake, together, each thinking of the other.

She didn't want to leave Tree Hill now, and wondered what was going to happen. Everything was in limbo. In L.A., she had a job but no place to live, and here, she had a place to live but no job. She inwardly decided that her happiness was worth more than any paycheck.

"I want to stay here," she said after a while.

"You can stay here as long as you want," he said suggestively.

"No, smart ass. I want to stay in Tree Hill." She pulled back to look at him and could see the happiness or relief, or both, in his eyes.

"Good," he said.

She pulled away even further, and a look of surprise came to her face. "What? No Lucas Scott speech about how my career is too important to leave behind? No rationalization and common sense discussion?" she asked.

"No. You're not going to hear me tell you any reasons why you shouldn't stay. I've made that mistake before," he said with a grin.

Her expression changed from a smile, to one of concern. "Luke, I'm.."

"Staying," he interrupted. "And that gives us plenty of time to figure things out."

She curled herself against him again and the tears finally stopped falling. She didn't want to leave this room. Ever. Ever again. She wanted to stay here with him and be with him forever. She didn't want to take things slow. She wanted to be Lucas and Peyton. The Lucas and Peyton from his novel. The ones who no one could ever even dream of being apart. She knew they would be. They both did.

But for now, they just lay in each others' arms. They didn't kiss. They didn't talk. They didn't joke or play or reminisce. They just lay there in the silence that was speaking all the words that neither of them had to say.

--

She woke up completely confused as to where she was. Then she noticed the familiar scent of him. That mix of cologne and sweat that only he could carry. She smiled at the thought. She began running her hand up and down his side like she used to when they'd share a bed - it had always been her way of waking him up. He stirred to life next to her and lifted his head gently as if he too, was wondering whose arms were around him.

"Hey you," he said sleepily.

"Hi," she said through her smile.

He ran his hand up and down her arm and it sent shivers up her spine. He noticed her body shake.

"Are you cold?" he asked.

"No," she chuckled. "I just...I forgot what how good it feels."

"How good what feels?" he asked.

"This," she said simply. "Waking up with you and your hands on my skin. Makes me wonder how I went without it for so long."

He pressed a kiss to her temple, trying to stop himself from thinking of all the other things he wanted to do to her. With her.

"It's...Oh God, it's 6:00," she said, glancing at the clock on his wall. They both laughed at how long they'd slept. "I should get back to my big empty house."

"What? And leave me in mine?" he said.

"What happened to slow?" she asked innocently, sitting up and tucking her legs beneath her.

"You said you're in love with me," he said, grinning and putting his arm behind his head

"Shut up! I did not!" she protested.

"You did too!" he said. "On the River Court. You said you're still in love with me." A smug smile came across his face, like he'd just conquered the unconquerable.

"I'm going," she said, swinging her legs onto the floor and standing. He followed suit.

"Not so fast," he said, walking in front of her and placing his hands on her hips. "I don't know how many of these we need to have, but I hope this is our last first kiss ever," he whispered, pulling her close. He kissed her gently on the mouth. It was tentative and chaste and yet full of everything they each had to offer.

"Nice line, Scott," she said after they'd parted.

"Hey, I had to say something to keep you coming back," he said with a smirk.

"No," she said, walking towards the door and looking back at him. "You didn't."

She smiled at him, then closed the door behind her.

Walking towards her house in the drizzle that had started to fall, she still felt a million emotions running through her. She had decided she was staying, but was worried about her job and her things in L.A. She was worried about how long it would take her to get over Evan, but realized somewhere between Lucas' house and hers that she already was. The thought of that made her so sad she almost couldn't believe it. She finally realized what Lucas had done with Brooke when they were in high school. He'd thrown himself into a relationship because he couldn't admit to himself who he truly wanted. That's what she'd done with Evan. She told herself all along that she was over Lucas, and it took her two years of being in the wrong relationship to realize that she wasn't.

**--**

**A/N:** OK, so I was going to use _The Comet _as the book, but I just used that in another story (One a Night Like This /end shameless plug/) so I came up with something completely different. I know a lot of people were wondering what the book was going to be, so I hope I didn't disappoint! Thanks again for reading and reviewing!


	10. Chapter 10

"So, P. Sawyer, how's the beach house?" Brooke said, sitting on the edge of the blonde's bed. "Where's Evan?"

Peyton's back was to her friend, and when she rolled over to face her, she saw the look on Brooke's face change.

"OK, puffy eyes, no man in the bed," she said, then picked up Peyton's left hand. "No ring. What happened?" she asked, her voice laced with concern. She was pretty sure she knew what, or rather who, had happened.

"Evan left, Brooke. He's in L.A. But thanks for reminding me that I now own a house I don't want," she said, raising her hands to her face.

"What happened?" Brooke repeated as Peyton sat up in her bed.

"He said I still love Lucas," she said, her eyes meeting Brooke's, expecting to see shock or...something.

"OK," the brunette said.

"OK?" Peyton asked. "That's all you have to say?"

"Peyton, we've all been waiting for you to figure it out. No one more than Lucas. I kind of knew the other day that you had finally come to your senses."

Peyton groaned and leaned back on her pillow again. "You're going to think I'm crazy," she said.

"What? Why?" Brooke asked with a laugh.

"I kind of went to see Lucas and blamed it all on him and maybe said I love him," she rambled. "Then we went to his house and..."

"Peyton! Tell me he didn't sleep with you!" Brooke shouted, standing from the bed. Brooke had always thought Lucas would know better than to take advantage of a woman's fragile emotional state. She also knew that when it came to Peyton, all the 'rules' went out the window.

"No! No. We just talked and stuff," she said reassuringly. "I decided to stay in Tree Hill."

"What!?" Brooke asked excitedly, reaching for Peyton's hands.

"I'm staying."

"OK, I'm trying really hard not to freak out right now and it's your life and you're the one just...calm," Brooke said. "I need all the details. Are you and Lucas together now? How are you going to get your stuff here? What about work? What about the beach house?"

"Brooke, slow down. I have time to figure it all out. Lucas and I are...I don't really know what we are. But we're something. I don't know how to get my stuff here. I'm going to quit my job and find something here. And I don't know about the beach house. It's in my name, but there's no way I'm keeping it."

"So, sell the house!" Brooke exclaimed.

"Brooke!" Peyton said with a smile.

"What? Then at least you wouldn't have to worry about a job for a while!" Brooke shrugged her shoulders innocently.

"I guess I'll have to talk to Evan," Peyton admitted. "I'm sure he doesn't want to talk to me ever again. He was pretty heartbroken."

"Can you blame him?" Brooke asked. "He's losing you!"

"Stop it," Peyton said self-deprecatingly. "He said that I'm his Lucas."

"Oh, Lord help him if that's true," Brooke said, rolling her eyes.

"I don't think I can talk to him. Ever." Peyton was fidgeting with the bottom of her tank top.

"I'll take care of it then," Brooke offered, grabbing her friend's hands.

"What?" Peyton asked. "Why would you do that?"

"Because you're my best friend," she grinned.

Peyton grabbed Brooke into a hug and the two chatted some more about everything that had happened and everything that still needed to be taken care of.

"You want to know the craziest thing?" Peyton asked.

"What?" Brooke said, with a perplexed look. Was any of this _not_ crazy?

"I finally feel like I'm where I'm supposed to be. Like I left and tried other things and realized that this is my place. Almost like I had to make a bunch of wrong decisions before making the right one," Peyton explained. "That probably sounds stupid."

"No, Peyton, it doesn't," Brooke insisted. "I did the same thing."

They sat for a few minutes like they used to - the two of them in Peyton's bedroom sitting on her bed and filling each other in on the drama.

"You want to see Lucas right now, don't you?" Brooke asked with a grin.

"Is that stupid? I can't stop thinking about him," Peyton said, looking at her friend with her brow furrowed, trying to quell the smile that she knew was going to spread anyway.

"It's not stupid. You want to make up for lost time," Brooke said, relieved to see her friend happy again and not just pretending. "Get dressed and go talk to him."

Peyton smiled and finally threw back the covers and made her way to the bathroom.

"I'll call Evan and get everything sorted out. Talk to you later!" Brooke shouted over the running water before leaving the room. As she was walking down the stairs, she couldn't help but think she had her friend back. Her real friend, not the zombie who'd been posing as Peyton.

--

She walked up the steps to his house and gently tapped on the glass of his door. There was no answer, but something - probably her desire to see him - told her to turn the knob anyway. The door was unlocked and she peered inside the room to see him sleeping on his bed with his copy of _To Kill a Mockingbird_ resting on his stomach. She smiled at the sight of him laying there in his jeans and button down, reading her favourite book.

She walked lightly into the room, not wanting to wake him. She lifted the book off his stomach and placed it on the table next to his bed, and noticed a photo of her, Haley, Nathan and himself from their senior year sitting next to his lamp. She looked down at his sleeping face. He had a days' growth of stubble and his hair was matted from the pillow. The hand resting on his chest was strong and calloused and manly. Some time in the three years since she'd seen him, he'd grown into a man. His body was more defined and his features more hardened. He'd never looked sexier than he did right now. So she leaned down and kissed the side of his mouth and ran her hand down his chest so it rested on his stomach.

He stirred from his sleep and seemed a little shocked that she was sitting next to him. He smiled and stretched and wiped his eyes with his hands.

"Hi," she said quietly.

"Hey," he said through his grin. "It's not so bad to wake up to that."

"Sorry, I should have let you sleep," she said. "I just had to see you."

"OK, I'm am more and more happy that you came over," he said, resting a hand on her thigh as he lay on his back. "You feeling better?"

"I feel...amazing," she said with a smile.

"Yeah?" he asked, sitting up in his bed and resting his back against the headboard.

"Yeah. Brooke's going to take care of getting my stuff here and she's going to talk to Evan about the beach house and everything," Peyton explained. "I can just focus on finding a job and...well...on you," she finished with a smile.

"Remind me to thank her for that later," he said, pulling her arm so she was closer to him.

"I know it's been three years, Lucas, and I really hope you don't hate me for this," she started, looking down at her hand as it played with one of the buttons on his shirt. "But I really think we should take things kind of slow."

"I don't hate you," he said with a chuckle. "And we have the rest of our lives, right?"

"If you'll have me," she said timidly.

"Careful what you wish for, Peyton," he joked with his eyebrow raised suggestively. He slowly ran his thumb over her knuckles as he held her now bare left hand in his. "So does slow mean I can't kiss you?"

"Well, if you don't kiss me I have no use for you at all," she teased. "Get over here."

He placed his hand on the side of her face and kissed her gently. Before the could get too caught up in each other, Peyton's phone rang.

"Sorry," she said, looking into his eyes as she pulled away. "Hello?" she spoke into the phone.

"Peyton, I talked to Evan and he said he wants you to have the house," Brooke said.

"What?" she shouted, making Lucas shoot her a worried look.

"He said that he bought it for you and he wants you to have it," Brooke explained.

"That's ridiculous! Did you tell him that is insane?" Peyton asked.

"I told him you wouldn't accept it and he said that it's in your name and he wants you to have it. I told him you wouldn't go for it and he said that you could sell it if you wanted to," Brooke said.

"Um, OK. Well, can you meet me there? We should talk about this. I want you to see it," she said, resolved to the fact that she now owned property that she didn't know what to do with.

"OK. I'll see you in a bit," Brooke said and they hung up.

"New development," Peyton said, turning back to Lucas. "You want to see my new house?"

"What? How is that possible?" he asked.

"Evan said he bought it for me and he wants me to have it," she explained shaking her head. "This is so freaking like him. Have you ever met someone so stubborn?" she asked, looking at him.

"Um...you?" he joked, and she playfully hit him on the arm. "So let's go see this place."

He grabbed his keys from his dresser and opened the door to exit his room. He opened the passenger side door of his car for her then walked around to the driver's side. They drove with the windows down listening to music and talking.

"This feels like a deja vu," she said, making him smile.

"Feels good," he said, raising her hand to his lips.

She gave him the directions to the house, and he pulled the car into the driveway

"This place is..." he started as they stood in front of the house. "Well, it's not small."

"It's crazy, right?" she said, watching as his eyes took in the sight in front of them as Brooke drove up and parked behind them. She grinned at the couple standing in front of her. She couldn't explain it, but with the two of them back together, everything felt a little more balanced. It was as though Peyton and Lucas being together made everything stable within their circle of friends. There was no tension, no hushed conversations regarding either of their love lives, no plotting to get them back together. There was just peace.

"Well, Mr. Scott, you aren't wasting any time moving in on the newly single Peyton," the brunette joked, playfully bumping his shoulder with hers.

"Hi Brooke," he said with a grin.

"So are you going to show us the inside?" Brooke asked.

"Let's go," Peyton sighed, holding up the key and walking towards the front door.

The three of them walked through the house with sunlight pouring through the windows. Brooke commented on the tasteful wall colours and gorgeous kitchen cabinets and counters. Lucas noted the high ceilings and hardwood floors. They both agreed that the house was flawless.

"I would feel terrible selling it," Peyton explained as they stood in the empty living room, her voice echoing. "It feels like I'd be taking his money or something."

"So keep it," Lucas said, making both women snapped their heads and stared at him blankly. "Come on, you can't live at your dad's place forever. This house is amazing, and not to mention free," he added with a laugh. "You should live here."

"Lucas," Peyton started, looking into his eyes, "I am not going to keep a house bought by my ex-fiancée."

"He's right," Brooke said. "You need a place to live, this place is amazing, and bonus: I live 5 minutes away!"

"I don't know," Peyton said, turning in a circle and taking in the huge open room they were standing in. She could picture art on the walls, and where she'd place a sofa, but she was still skeptical.

"Well, you're out of options. If you don't want to sell it and you don't want to live in it, what else are you going to do with it?" Brooke asked.

"She's right, Peyt." Lucas chimed in.

Peyton threw him a smile and shook her head in disbelief. She knew they were right, and resolved herself to the fact that she was now a homeowner. She and Brooke chatted about the house and wandered back into the sun-filled kitchen as Lucas checked his watch.

"Hey," he said, standing in the entranceway to the room they were laughing in. "I have to run and meet Skills."

"OK," Peyton said with a smile. "I'll get Brooke to take me home."

"Oh, you will, will you?" Brooke teased.

"I'll see you later," he said, a satisfied smile playing on his lips. He was so happy to be able to say that phrase to her again. He wanted to kiss her, but he didn't want to rush anything, and he didn't want to make Brooke uncomfortable.

Peyton offered a small wave in his direction and turned back to her friend when the door closed behind Lucas. She wished he'd kissed her.

"OK, are we all going to be subjected to the lovey-dovey Luke and Peyton from senior year from now on?" Brooke asked with a roll of her eyes.

"Brooke, I don't even know what we are," Peyton said pointedly, looking back to the ocean as it swelled just a pane of glass and a couple hundred feet away from her.

"Please," Brooke sang in one drawn out syllable. "You and Luke are _never_ just friends. You're single. He's single. _And_, he's in love with you."

"Stop it," Peyton pleaded.

"What?" Brooke asked defensively. "It's true!"

"I know," the blonde admitted quietly. She knew he loved her; he'd made himself perfectly clear. "I just want to go slow."

"Right. Slow." Brooke laughed until she saw the confused and questioning look on her friend's face. "You're telling me that if he wanted to do it, you wouldn't? And trust me, he wants to."

"You're a perv, you know that?" Peyton stated. "I haven't even been single for 24 hours!"

"Right," Brooke agreed. "But your entire two year relationship, you were secretly still in love with Lucas, so it's kind of like you were just on vacation from each other. And just think of how hot the sex will be after all this time!"

"OK, this conversation is over," Peyton said with a grin on her face as she walked towards the front door of her new house.

"I see that smile, P. Sawyer! You're totally thinking about it!" Brooke called after her as her heels clicked on the hardwood.

--

Lucas pulled up to the River Court where Nathan and Skills were already playing. He was glad they were both in the same place at the same time so he could break the news only once. They greeted him as he walked on the court and the smile on his face must have been bigger than he intended, because right away Nathan asked what was up.

"What?" Lucas asked in mock innocence.

"Dude, you haven't smiled like that in...three years. What is going on!?" Nathan asked, though he was sure he already knew the answer.

"Evan is out of the picture. The engagement is off. Last night when she came here she was pissed and blaming me," Lucas started.

"Yeah, we were here for that part," Skills interrupted.

"She said she wants to take it slow, so I don't really know what's going on, but it's something," he finished. He took the ball from his brother and shot it through the chains.

"Slow? You are taking it slow with the girl you've been in love with since you were like, born?" Nathan asked, picking up the bouncing ball.

"What?" Lucas asked innocently, looking at Skills who was suppressing a laugh.

"Luke, there's no slow with you and Peyton. There's nothing, or there's full on," Skills pointed out, slapping his friend on the shoulder. "And this time it's definitely not nothing."

Lucas contemplated his friend's statement. Skills and Nathan were right. He didn't want to waste time any more. He wanted them to be together forever, and he wanted that forever to start as soon as possible. He wanted them to live together and share everything and get married. He wanted to wake up next to her every day and smile at her sleeping face. He wanted a life with her.

But of course, he couldn't tell her all this right now. She'd asked if they could take it slow, and even though he now realized that was the last thing he wanted to do, he didn't want to scare her or ruin anything, so he'd have to follow her lead.

"Luke!" Nathan shouted, pulling his brother from his train of thought, knowing full well what, or rather who, the blonde's mind was on. "Haley wants to have you over for dinner tonight."

"Yeah, sounds good," he said as they saw Fergie approaching the court. They shot for teams and played for over an hour, but his mind was on her the entire time. Luckily, no one noticed, not that he would have cared if they had. He loved her, and he finally felt like she might just love him back.


	11. Chapter 11

After having dinner with Nathan and Haley that evening, Lucas went to Peyton's house. He had to see her. It was silly, he thought, since he'd just seen her earlier that same day. But there he was, tapping on her door and his heart rate speeding up as he heard her footsteps running down the stairs.

She swung the door open and a look of surprise came to her face.

"I know you weren't expecting me," he said sheepishly as he stepped inside.

"No, it's not that. I am just shocked that you didn't just walk in," she teased, and pressed her lips to his stubbly cheek. His hand found her hip as she leaned into him and his heart ached a little when she pulled away after kissing him.

"I thought we could talk," he admitted.

"Are you breaking up with me?" she joked, narrowing her eyes.

"Never," he said, kissing her forehead. "I just think we have plenty to say."

She walked into the living room of her house and flopped down on the couch. He sat next to her and lifted her legs onto his lap.

"Like what?" she asked.

"Like what you've been doing for the last two years," he stated. "And how you're feeling right now." He looked down and played with the cuff of her jeans.

"Right," she said with a nod. "I am feeling...like I wish I'd felt for the last three years."

His eyes met hers and he couldn't help himself from smiling. "And how's that?" he asked innocently.

"Like I'm where I should be. And with who I should be with. And doing what I should be doing," she stated, reaching over and running her fingers through the short hair over his ear.

"You couldn't have figured that out earlier?" he asked, only half joking. He felt her mood shift from happy to uncomfortable. "Sorry. I just...we need to sort everything out here."

"Sort everything out?" she repeated. Her hand moved to the back of the couch and she pulled her legs from his lap, crossing them so she was facing him, and he turned his body so they were looking at each other.

"I think we need to air things out," he admitted.

"Right. Because as soon as things are going smoothly, you want to make them all heavy again," she said somewhat bitterly.

"No," he protested gently. "I just think we should get our issues out of the way so things can actually be smooth, as opposed to just pretending the issues aren't there."

She sighed heavily and turned away from him. "OK, so let's hear it."

"Hear what?" he asked.

"Everything," she said, looking back to him.

They spent the next two hours talking about 'them'. There were rough parts and not-so-rough parts, but they each put all their worries and concerns and feelings on the table for the other to see. He admitted that he was angry she hadn't called after he left L.A., and she admitted she was still angry that he'd left her there, and that _he_ hadn't called _her_. She explained that she met Evan the night of his book signing, and opened herself to the possibility of being in a relationship because she was convinced he was over her. It was hard for him to hear, but he wanted to know everything. He knew they had a few more intense conversations in the near future, but this was a start.

"I should have listened to my mom," he said, shaking his head.

"What?" she asked, perplexed.

"When I asked her for the ring, she told me to never let you go," he stated. She shot him a look of complete confusion. "Oh. Right. Well, the ring is the same ring Keith gave my mom," he admitted and her eyes immediately teared. "She told me it was for the woman I was going to marry, and to ask her for it when I wanted it. I went to her before I left to go see you, and she told me that she knew you were the one, and made me promise I'd never let you go."

"Lucas," she said softly, a tear falling from her eye. He reached up and wiped it away with the back of his index finger. He smiled at her and rested his hand on the side of her neck.

"I think she's still pissed at me for letting you get away," he said with a soft laugh.

"You have me now," she said, smiling at him and placing her hand on top of his.

"I don't want to mess this up, Peyt," he said, moving closer to her and pressing his forehead to hers.

"We won't," she insisted. "Not this time."

She pressed her lips to his and her hands made their way to his back. Her tongue passed over his bottom lip and he granted her request to deepen the kiss. It was filled with all the want and desire they'd both felt since...since they were 16. His hands found their way to her curls - like they used to when they'd kiss - and her hair cascaded around his knuckles. She placed a hand on the back of his neck and ran her hand through his short blonde hair.

They broke apart, each needing breath and she pulled back to study his face. She ran her hand lightly along the stubble of his jaw line, and stared deep into his eyes. They'd always been full of every emotion he held, and that was still the case now.

"You're so sexy," she said softly.

A breathy chuckle left his lips before she pressed hers against them again. He leaned back on the sofa so she was laying on top of him, and his hands made their way to her hips while hers were pushing his shirt up to reveal his stomach. She tugged the fabric and he sat up out of instinct, briefly breaking their kiss so she could pull the cotton over his head. Her hips rocked against his as he laid back down, and he stifled a moan. The sensation of her body against his brought him back to reality.

"Peyton," he said in a low growl. She did not relent. She kissed along his neck and down his chest. He grabbed her arms and pulled her up so their faces met. "What happened to slow?" he posed the same question she'd asked him a couple days before, with the half-grin she fell in love with as a teenager. It was almost painful for him to say the words.

"What?" she asked, trying to catch her breath. She brushed her hair out of her face and looked down at him. "I'm sorry," she said, shifting her weight off him and back to where she'd originally been sitting at the other end of the couch. She gently rubbed her now swollen bottom lip with her finger and threw him an innocent look.

He just lay there, still topless and smiling at her. He placed his arm behind his head as he stared at her flushed face.

"What?!" she finally asked.

"Nothing," he said, the grin still plastered on his face. She tilted her head and glared at him, knowing he had something to say. "Just can't resist how sexy I am, right?"

"Stop it," she insisted and playfully slapped his leg. He didn't think it was possible, but her face got even redder.

"It's OK to admit it, Peyt," he teased.

She stood from the couch and picked his shirt up from where she'd tossed it on the floor, and dropped it on his face as she walked past him on the couch. "Put this on and be quiet."

He pulled the fabric over his head as he followed her into the kitchen where she was now standing filling a glass with water. He walked up behind her and placed his hands on her hips, kissing her neck softly. "Sorry," he whispered.

"For teasing me? Or for stopping me?" she asked setting her glass on the counter, afraid to turn around.

"Both," he admitted, turning her around in his arms. "I still think we should wait."

"You're right," she agreed with a single nod and a deep breath. "Waiting."

"I should go," he stated before plating a kiss on her forehead.

"Luke, you don't have to go," she said, running her hand up and down his arm.

"Isn't Brooke taking you furniture shopping tomorrow?" he asked with a grin and she groaned at the thought. "You're going to need to conserve your energy. And seeing as you can't keep your hands off me..."

"Lucas," she protested, pulling away from him. "Do _not_ tease me, or I will tease you," she threatened with a kinked eyebrow, implying his punishment would be much more cruel than this was.

"OK, OK," he gave in and started towards the door. She caught up to him and slid her hand into his. The simple gesture alone was enough to make him smile. "Skills and I have to go to Raleigh tomorrow and we won't be back until Monday."

"Oh," she said, slight disappointment in her voice. He put his arms around her waist again.

"Two days should be enough time for you to cool off," he joked.

She hit him flat palmed in the chest. "Lucas Scott! Get out of here," she demanded, with a smile on her face. He loved to see that smile.

He kissed her softly on the lips and then just held her for a few moments, breathing in her scent and trying to convince himself that this was actually happening. He was here, with Peyton in his arms, kissing her, and joking with her, and being happy with her.

"I love you, you know that?" he asked, pressing a kiss to the top of her head.

She looked at him and smiled. "I like you a little bit, too."

He laughed and pulled the door open. "I'll see you in a couple days," he promised.

"Call me," she requested as he started down the steps of the porch. He turned around and walked back to her quickly, kissing her again and cupping her cheeks with his hands. "What was that?" she asked one he'd pulled away.

"I had to," he said with a grin.

"I know the feeling," she mumbled and he laughed as he walked down the steps to his car.

She closed the door and leaned against it. Why had she ignored this for the last three years?


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N:** So I have the entire story written. Actually, it's been completed for a while. It's 15 chapters total, so we're coming closer to the end. I know some of you are going crazy because they're "taking it slow"...but I'm just mean like that. :)

In addition to the other story I have on the go (_All I Need_), I've started another completely different chapter story, which I'll start posting when this one is done. Yes, all I do in the little free time I have is write.

You guys are awesome - I love your reviews!

**--**

Peyton spent two days packing her things from her dad's house and shopping for furniture with Brooke. She didn't see the point of shopping for things to fill her home when she didn't have any money to pay for anything. She'd had a bit saved, more than enough to last until she found job, but not enough to furnish an entire house. And being the amazing person that her best friend was, Brooke offered to front her the money - as long as she had a say in the interior decor.

She found herself missing Lucas. Almost constantly, actually. But it wasn't an aching sense of longing like it had been for so long. It was more a feeling of intense anticipation. She knew he'd come back. She knew he'd put his arms around her and kiss her and smile at her. She missed that smile. Brooke caught her watching the clock a couple times as they boxed up countless records the day he was getting back.

"It's only a few more hours," Brooke said playfully.

"What?" Peyton asked innocently as she placed another stack of records into a box.

"'_What?' _Seriously? You think I don't know you've been counting the seconds?" the brunette laughed.

"Whatever," Peyton said, brushing off the comment. "Hey! Make sure you put them in there in the right order. It took me forever to alphabetize these."

"Oh my God. Do you know how lucky you are that I'm even touching these things?" Brooke asked and ran her finger along the cover of a James Taylor album, holding up her index finger to show the dust.

"And I thank you," Peyton said sincerely. "I can't believe I'm going to have an entire room devoted to my records."

She glanced towards the clock again, and immediately turned to Brooke, who was staring at her with a kinked eyebrow and her head tilted. "Don't say it," Peyton warned. Brooke smiled and held up her hands in defeat.

--

"I'm surprised you aren't yelling at me to drive faster," Skills said with a chuckle.

"What are you talking about?" Lucas asked, a grin on his face as they drew closer to their hometown.

"You've been completely restless since we got on the highway." Skills took his eyes off the road briefly - just long enough to see Lucas roll his eyes.

Lucas had thought about her non-stop since he left her house two nights before. He'd done something that night that he'd never been able to do with Peyton Sawyer - he resisted the urges he was feeling in the moment. He wondered how different his life would be if he'd done that in high school. If he'd stopped her from kissing him either time she did it while he was with Brooke. Would things be different? After a while, he realized that they wouldn't. Because he and Peyton were meant to be together, and if it hadn't happened the way that it had, they would have found another way to each other.

His phone rang where he'd been clutching it in his hand and he smiled when he saw her name flash across the screen. He ignored Skills laughing at him as he answered.

"Hi," he said, contentedly.

"Hey," she greeted him. "I just wanted to tell you that I'm going to be at the new house later. You know, if you wanted to stop by." She suddenly felt odd just assuming that he'd see her as soon as he got back into town. Little did she know that that was exactly what he'd planned to do.

"Sure. We're about an hour away," he said, looking over to his friend who was still smiling. "You want me to grab some food?"

"No, it's OK. I'll take care of it," she said. "Ugh. I have to go. Brooke's tapping her Jimmy Choo's at me. Apparently I'm taking too long."

He chuckled, then said goodbye and snapped his phone shut. He didn't even have to look at Skills to know that he was stifling a laugh.

"Don't say anything, man," Lucas warned, grinning from ear to ear, still relishing the sound of her voice.

"Not a word, Mr. Sawyer," Skills joked.

--

Lucas rapped his knuckles on the heavy wooden door of Peyton's new house. He heard her call for him to come in, so he pushed against the flat surface and walked inside, kicking off his shoes and walking into the living room. He couldn't believe his eyes. In front of him was Peyton, in a green tank top and jeans, with a bottle of wine, two glasses, and blanket spread in the centre of the floor. Candles were scattered throughout the room, and a box of pizza was laying on the blanket. The name on the box was the name of he and Keith's old favourite pizza place.

He walked towards her with a smile. "What's this?" he asked, placing his hands on her hips and kissing her forehead.

"Kind of lame for a first date, right?" she asked with a smile. She motioned for him to sit down, and they settled onto the blanket.

"It's perfect," he smiled, watching as she handed him a paper plate.

They sat with the orange glow of the candles flickering around them, their voices echoing through the still empty house. He told her about his trip and how the purpose was to scout a student who'd be starting Tree Hill High that coming fall. She told him about the days she'd spent shopping with Brooke, and how, despite her comments to the contrary, she was grateful to her friend for helping her so much.

Between the two of them, the finished the pizza and half the bottle of wine was gone when Lucas moved their plates and the empty box off the blanket, and stood, gesturing for her to follow him. She looked at him, wondering what he was doing, and he grabbed the blanket off the floor and lead her to the back patio of the house. The night was clear and the tide was coming in as the sun tucking below the horizon cast pinks and oranges across the sky in front of them. He stood behind her with his arms around her and the blanket around them both. They didn't speak. They just stood there, each relishing the feeling of being with the other.

After about a half hour of feeling his chest move as he breathed behind her, she finally spoke.

"I love you, Lucas," she said softly, and she felt his arms tighten around her. It was the first time she'd consciously said it in years. The night at the River Court, she didn't realize she'd said it, and he wasn't sure she'd meant it.

This time, he knew she was completely sincere. Over the years, he'd heard her say the words countless times before, but somehow, this was different. He leaned to kiss her shoulder.

"I love you too, Peyton," he whispered.

She spun around in his arms and leaned up to kiss him. It felt to her like the first time they'd each admitted it. They were both scared of what it meant and what would come next, but they knew it was something good. No matter what they faced, they'd face it together. Lucas and Peyton.

He pulled her flush against his body as she kissed the hinge of his jaw and nibbled his ear. She continued kissing his neck before finding his lips again and capturing them in a passionate kiss. His hands raised the fabric of her shirt and skimmed his hands over the soft skin of her back and she let out a soft moan as she felt his touch. Eliciting that kind of sound from her just made him want her more. She reached up and traced her index finger along his jaw line at the same time a cool breeze passed over them.

"OK, stop," he sighed. She pulled away and saw the smile on his face, before burying her face in his chest again and laughing.

"Sorry," she mumbled and his hands ran up and down her back.

"Don't apologize," he chuckled. She pulled away and looked up at him with a smirk. He tucked a stray curl behind her ear. "You're beautiful," he stated, almost as though he was just realizing it.

She lowered her head. He still had the ability to make her feel like a teenaged girl hearing these sentiments for the first time. His hand found her chin and raised it so their eyes met again.

"I'm serious, Peyton. You're so gorgeous," he said softly, and pressed his lips to hers again.

When they parted to breathe, he heard her giggle, and looked at her questioningly.

"What did we do before sex came into the picture?" she asked.

"Well, made out in the library hiding from Brooke, and then again when you were bleeding." She narrowed her eyes at him before he continued. "The psycho stalker on prom night kind of ruined the mood. You need me to go on?" he joked.

"Right," she nodded. "I know we should wait, I do. It's not just sex any more, is it?"

"It never was with us," he admitted.

She pulled away from his arms and walked back into the house and into the living room.

"You OK?" he asked after following her.

"I'm fine. I just...needed to get away from you for a minute," she admitted.

"Ouch," he said softly.

"No, no. It's not like that." She smiled at him as he wrapped the blanket around her bare shoulders and stepped back. "I just...if you keep looking at me the way you keep looking at me, then there'll be no more going slow."

"And if you keep saying things like that, we're going to have the same problem," he said with a laugh. They shared a knowing look and he took a deep breath.

"So, you want to camp out in my bedroom for the night?" she asked, and he raised his eyebrow at her. "You have to sleep, right? All I have is a couple pillows and sleeping bags, though."

"I'd love to," he replied.

--

They woke the next morning tangled in each other in their clothes in the big empty bedroom. She smiled against his chest and pulled him closer, not wanting him to go. He kissed the top of her head and she reached for his wrist, checking his watch for the time.

"You have to go!" she shouted, sitting up abruptly.

"What?" he laughed, watching her move frantically.

"They're delivering furniture today and Nathan is helping me move stuff. I have to go home and change and you have to go so he doesn't see you," she said in a panic.

"Peyton, we're not 17 anymore," he pointed out, standing and placing his hands on her shoulders. "You don't have to hide me."

"I'm not. I just...I don't know what he and Haley are going to think of me getting together with you so quickly after...everything," she admitted.

"They won't judge you. They wanted this to happen, too. And besides, they both already know and neither said anything."

"You told them?" she asked, shock evident in her voice.

"Told my brother and my best friend that I somehow got back the woman I never should have let go?" he asked. "Yeah, I might have mentioned it."

She smiled at him and realized how silly she was being. Of course he'd told them. She'd told Brooke, so she really didn't have a reason to be upset. She kissed him quickly and they made their way down the stairs and she locked the front door behind them.

He kissed her again before she got into her car and drove away. His phone rang in his pocket and Haley asked him to help her with Jamie for the day, so he went home and showered before heading to the other Scott household.

The entire time, he couldn't stop himself from smiling.

--

By the middle of the afternoon, most of the furniture she'd ordered for the master bedroom, kitchen, dining room, office, and living room had been delivered. Now Nathan was helping her unload her personal things from a small truck Brooke had rented for her.

They only had about 10 more boxes left to bring inside when she suggested they take a break. He wiped the sweat from his forehead and agreed instantly.

"Nathan, can I ask you a question?" Peyton asked, tossing him a bottle of water.

"Tell me it's not more heavy lifting than I'm already doing," he joked before taking a long swill from the plastic bottle.

"No," she smiled. "And I love you for this, by the way."

"Yeah, yeah," he said with a grin. "What's up?" He hoisted himself so he was sitting on the counter top, and did the same and sat across from him, perched on the island in the kitchen.

"OK, you totally have the right to refuse to answer since he's your brother and I'm your ex and I know everything is..." she started rambling.

"Peyton," he interrupted, signaling for her to get to the point.

"Well it's just...when you and Haley first started dating, how hard was it to take things slow?" she asked nervously and he laughed. "Oh God, I didn't mean to say 'hard'. I just mean..."

"Jeez Sawyer, I've seen you naked and you're still nervous talking about sex with me?" he took another sip of his water, trying to hide the smug grin on his face.

"Not talking about sex _with_ you," she clarified, holding up her index finger in protest. "_To_ you."

"Either way," he shrugged. "Not that I really want to know what happens with you and Lucas behind closed doors, trust me," he said with his eyes closed. "Taking it slow is...har...difficult," he said, choosing his words carefully.

"Yeah?" she asked.

"Especially since you're not a teenager and you've two have done it before. With Haley it was different because she was...well, it was different." He placed his bottle of water next to him and placed his hands on the counter on either side of him, leaning forward slightly.

"Right. So what did you do about it?" she asked.

"We got married," he said with a laugh and raised his eyebrows suggestively. Peyton tilted her head waiting for a serious answer. "I just didn't pressure her. It was tough, but I loved her, you know? I wasn't about to lose her because she wasn't ready to go there. I knew she loved me, so I just waited for her to let me know when she was ready."

"Hmm," was Peyton's only response.

"OK, what's going on?" he asked. Clearly there was more on her mind than she was telling him. "Is Luke pushing you?"

"No!" she shouted, perhaps too loudly and too quickly. She got a confused look in return. "Actually, it's kind of the other way around," she said meekly.

"What?!" Nathan asked with a grin. "Has my brother finally lost his mind? I thought you were the one who wanted to take things slow."

"I did. But it's me and Lucas, you know?" she asked and got a nod from Nathan. "But now he's all about rebuilding everything and working it all out before we...do that."

"And you want it," Nathan smirked.

"OK, can you not make it sound like I'm a horny teenaged boy?" she pleaded, hopping down from the counter.

"Peyton, just talk to him," Nathan advised, following her towards the front door. "Or just do what you want to do. There's no way he'll say no to you," he said with a laugh.

"You're really enjoying this, aren't you!?" she asked, spinning around to face him.

"I just didn't know I had a sister," he said, shaking his head at the thought of his older brother refusing sex from a gorgeous woman. One that he was in love with, no less.

"Oh God! You can't say anything to him!" she begged, just now realizing that Nathan could use this against Lucas and torment him about it. "I'm serious. Not a word, Nathan."

"OK!" he said, holding his arms up in defeat. "I won't say anything, I promise." His declaration was met by a skeptical glare, but he knew she believed him. "Let's get some more stuff," he said, walking past her and back to the truck.

Never had she thought she'd be asking Nathan Scott, her ex-boyfriend, for relationship advice. They were the reigning king and queen of relationship drama while they were together, but somehow, he'd turned out to be surprisingly insightful when it came to relationships. Peyton knew that was more thanks to Haley than it was to him, but it was nice to have a little male perspective, even if it did make them both slightly uncomfortable that the one she was getting advice on was Nathan's brother.

--

Haley was sitting at her piano when Lucas walked into the room and smiled at the sight of her perched in front of the shiny black instrument, her face reflected in front of her.

"Jamie's down for a nap," he informed her, sitting next to her on the bench.

"Thanks so much, Luke. Sorry I called you, I just really needed a bit of time to myself. I know that's selfish," she stated genuinely.

"Hales, it's not selfish at all. And I love that kid. I'm glad to help," he said, throwing an arm around her shoulder as she gently began playing a sweet melody.

"So," she started, a smile spreading on her face, "you and Peyton are good?" She turned to look at him and noticed the blush creeping to his face. Yup, he had it bad.

"Yeah," he simply agreed.

"I'm happy you're happy," she said, continuing with her hands on the keys.

She played for a few moments, both of them getting lost in the notes, before he spoke.

"Can I ask you something?" he said, still looking at his lap.

"Sure," she said nonchalantly, making a few comments on the sheet music in front of her before placing the pencil behind her ear again.

"When you and Nathan first got together, how weird was it to take everything slow?" he asked as her hands found the keys again.

"Well, it was definitely weirder for him than it was for me. He'd never been in a relationship that wasn't all about sex," she explained, turning away from the instrument and shifting her body towards him. "Why?"

"Well, Peyton wanted to wait," he stated.

"That's kind of smart," Haley said with slight nod.

"Right. It is," he stated, standing and moving to sit on the couch. "And I think we should let everything settle down before going there, you know? Build everything back up to what it was," he said.

Haley turned her back to the piano so she was facing Lucas, and leaned forward slightly, placing an elbow on her knee. "So, what's the problem, then?"

"Well, now she's...not so eager to wait," he explained delicately.

"And you are?" she said with a smile. "You might be the first man to ever admit that."

"I mean, I want to be with her. Badly," he said, shaking his head rapidly so as not to get lost in the image of the two of them together. "We just don't need to rush it, you know?"

"I know," she said with an understanding nod.

"So I guess I'm asking how you got Nathan to wait," he asked quietly.

"Well, that was a little different. But I just talked to him about it, as terrifying as that was for me at the time," she stated simply. "Luke, she'll understand."

"I'm just worried she'll think I'm rejecting her or something," he said with concern in his voice.

"Lucas, that's ridiculous!" she exclaimed. "You've never been able to take your eyes off her when you're together!"

"I know! And I love her. I just want that to be enough, you know?" he said shyly.

"Lucas Eu..." she stopped when she noticed the look on his face at the mention of his middle name. "Lucas Scott. You are enough for her. You are more than enough for her. You are everything that girl wants. Do not doubt that. Ever."

He sighed and a smile graced his lips. "Thanks, Hales. Listen, don't tell Nathan about this, OK?" he pleaded. "I'll never hear the end of it."

She laughed shook her head. "Not a word." She turned back to her piano. "Hey, I have an idea."

"What's that?" he asked, absentmindedly smoothing out a wrinkle on his shirt.

"You two should stay for dinner tonight. You'll have to keep your hands off each other if you're around me and Nathan and a 4 year old," she teased and he shook his head in response. "I'll call Nathan."

--

The five of them laughed over dinner, and Lucas found his attention constantly being drawn to Peyton as she tickled and giggled and doted on his nephew. He couldn't shake the feeling that someday, he'd be watching her with their own child. This would be their family. Nathan, Haley, Jamie, them, and their kids. Nathan and Haley noticed where his eyes were fixed and shared a glance. They both knew exactly what was running through Lucas' mind, and truthfully, they couldn't have been happier.

Nathan and Haley took Jamie up to bed and Lucas and Peyton started on the dishes. The tasks took an equal amount of time, so the four of them met in the living room for another glass of wine.

"Peyton, you're so good with Jamie," Haley commented. "He's always asking about you."

"He's an easy kid to love," the blonde replied. "I'm just sorry I've already missed so much with him." Lucas rested his hand on her thigh and she turned to smile at him.

Nathan and Haley sat across from them, just watching the two interact.

"OK, what?" Lucas asked.

"Nothing!" Haley answered with a huge smile on her face. "It's just good. This. All of us together and neither of you crying or brooding or yelling or engaged to someone else." They all laughed at how much of a whirlwind the last month had been.

"So what are you going to do for work?" Nathan asked, taking a sip from his glass.

"I honestly have no idea. I'm not really qualified for anything here. When you skip college to work in the music industry, a small town isn't exactly the land of opportunity," Peyton pointed out.

"Why don't you start your own label? Or a gallery or something?" Haley asked. Lucas smiled at the thought. He knew she'd be amazing at either.

"You need money for those kinds of things," Peyton countered. "I've always thought of my own label though. How awesome would that be?"

"You should do it," Lucas stated. "Look into some loans or something."

"You should," Nathan agreed.

"It would be a lot of work. And I'd be broke for a long time," she protested.

"Whatever!" Haley proclaimed. "You don't have to worry about a mortgage or rent or anything. Peyton, you would be so good at this."

"Maybe I'll look into it," she finally said. The more her friends encouraged her, the more she was convinced that she owed it to herself to at least see if it was feasible. And again, this was the difference between home and L.A. Here, people pushed you to do things out of your comfort zone. She had the support of friends. Whereas in L.A., everyone was too caught up in their own self-inflicted drama to help anyone else.

Around 10:00, they said their goodbyes and Lucas walked Peyton to her car and opened the door for her.

"You want to come over?" he asked innocently, assuming she'd want to.

"Actually, I should probably stay at my place," she said, looking at him and completely not knowing what to expect.

"Oh," he said, kneeling down beside the car so their faces met. "Is this about..."

"No!" she insisted. "It's not. I just...OK, it's about that a little bit." He rolled his eyes and sighed. "Lucas, it won't kill us to be apart for one night. You'll just have to miss me."

"I've done the 'missing you' thing. I'm really liking the 'being with you' thing," he said jokingly. She looked away from him and to her hands. "Sorry. I didn't mean for it to sound like that."

"I just want to be a good girlfriend," she admitted with a smile.

Girlfriend. She was his girlfriend again, and that thought alone was enough to make him forget about the whole 'going slow' plan.

"Go home, Luke. Go home and spend all day tomorrow writing, and come over after dinner, OK?" she pleaded.

"Can I call you at least?" he teased, kissing the top of her head.

"Sure. But if I don't answer, I'm screening," she joked. She turned the key and winked at him as he stepped back and let her drive away.


	13. Chapter 13

Peyton woke up in her brand new bed, with the sun on her skin and the ocean lapping outside her window. She stretched in her bed and smiled. She was really starting to love this house. She set her feet on the floor and padded to her en-suite bathroom to shower. She got dressed and went to her kitchen to brew some coffee. She was going to need it if she was going to look into starting her own label. She carried her mug to her office. Most of her things were still in boxes, but her laptop was on the new desk and her phone and internet had been set up the day before. She sat at the desk and started making a list of all the things she'd need, other than money, to see if having her own label was even a possibility.

She must have lost track of time, because a knock at her door at 3:00 pulled her from her work and she checked her clock for the first time since she'd sat down.

She made her way to the door and opened it to find a man holding a simple bouquet of lilies.

It was Wednesday.

She smiled and thanked the delivery person who'd handed her the flowers before going to her kitchen to put them in water. She stood admiring them for a few minutes, just thinking about Lucas. She thought about calling him, but she knew he'd expect it, so she didn't. She knew he'd be sitting in his room at his desk, writing with a smug grin on his face, and waiting for his phone to ring. So she didn't call. Instead, she went back to work until his gesture pulled her from her thoughts again.

She grabbed her purse and her car keys and ran out the door. She had someone she needed to talk to.

--

Lucas spent his entire day completely distracted from what he was trying to write. He managed to get a few pages written, but his eyes moved to his phone after every sentence he wrote, willing her to call. Around 4:00, he finally decided he couldn't just sit around in his house any more, so he went for a run. He ran through the entire town and past every place that held memories for the two of them.

He got to the River Court and found Skills there, so the two played a long one on one game and neither of them bothered to check the time. It was just the two of them playing for the sake of playing - like they used to. Finally, when they noticed it was 6:00, they went their separate ways. Lucas jogged back to his house and showered before eating his dinner as quickly as he could. He wanted to get to her house. He'd never _needed_ to see her this badly before.

Well once. And that time it all ended badly. This time, he wasn't going to make that mistake. He just had to see her.

--

She parked her car and walked until she was standing in front of the familiar stone. She'd only been here twice since coming back into town, and it felt good to be sitting on the grass, cross legged.

"Hi mom," she spoke softly. "I was going to fill you in on everything that's been going on, but I guess I don't really have to. You probably orchestrated the whole thing up there. I knew you'd like Lucas. He sent me lilies today, mom. Just like dad used to do for you. I told him that once and he remembered. I really love him. More than I ever thought I could. I'm just mad at myself for losing those three years with him, you know?" She spun a blade of grass between her fingers. "But we're still young, right? We have lots of time. I missed you, mom. I miss you every day, but I missed this. Just talking to you." She looked up and saw the dark gray stone with the name Scott etched into it. "I have one more stop to make, but I'll be back soon, OK? I love you."

She got up and placed her hand on the stone in front of her before she walked away.

"Hi Keith," she said with a smile, kneeling in front of his name and tracing the letters of his surname with her index finger. "You're probably up there shaking your head at me, aren't you? I know. You should be proud of him. I know you are, but...you have every reason to be. He's really grown into an amazing man, and I think that has a lot to do with you. So I guess I should thank you for that. You'd probably kick me in the ass for taking so long to realize that. He told me about the dream he had when he was in the hospital, and I don't think I ever said thank you for that either - for sending him back to me. I really can't ever let him go, you know?" She paused for a moment, realizing just how alike Lucas and Keith were. "I know he misses you. He talks about you all the time, so I feel like I know you better than I actually did. I'll come back sometime soon and chat."

She stood and thought silently about the man who'd raised Lucas for a few moments before walking back to her car. She wanted to get home because she knew he'd be coming over, and she couldn't wait to see him.

--

She was on the back porch of her house with a cup of tea when she heard a knock at the door. She walked through to answer it, and found him standing there with his back to her. He spun around when she cleared her throat.

"Hi! Sorry. Just uh...lost in thought," he stuttered, pressing a kiss to her forehead. They walked into the furnished house he'd never seen. "Whoa. This place looks great."

"It's OK," she groaned, looking around the space, tired from the amount of work it had already taken. "What were you thinking of just now?" she asked curiously.

"Oh, um...just taking in the scenery. I love this neighbourhood," he admitted. What he'd really been thinking was that he could see them raising a family here.

She sat on the sofa and he followed suit and pulled her body close to his. "It's not so bad," she said. "How was your day?"

"It was alright. I wrote for a while, then went for a run and played basketball for about two hours, then..." he started.

"Lucas, don't you have to be careful? What about your heart?" she interrupted, and looked at him worriedly.

"My heart's fine," he laughed. "I'm taking my medication and it was just a little one on one."

"It's not funny, Luke." Her tone was serious. "I am not about to lose you now."

"No, you're not. I've talked to my doctor and everything's fine," he explained. "But I love you for worrying about me." He pulled her face up to meet his and kissed her. "What'd you do today?"

"I researched what it would take to start my own label and it would be really hard," she admitted, defeat in her voice.

"Peyt, I know you can do it if you want to. And I'll help however I can," he said.

"Thanks," she said with a sincere smile. She'd missed this - someone having faith in her and willing to help her reach her potential. "Then the strangest thing happened," she said.

"Oh yea?" he asked, curious as to what she was referring to.

"_Someone_ sent me lilies," she said, turning to face him. "You know who that might have been?" she smiled.

"Hmm...nope. Not sure," he answered with a grin.

She tilted her head to him and pressed her lips to his gently. "Thank you," she whispered sincerely.

"You're welcome," he replied.

"Then I went and visited my mom and Keith," she finished.

"You...you visited Keith?" he asked, surprised.

"Yeah. I was there, and I stopped and talked to him a bit," she said with a shrug of her shoulders. She didn't realize what the gesture meant to him.

"What...I mean...what did you say?" he asked, still unable to believe she'd do that.

"Talked about you, mostly," she said with a grin. "I thanked him for being there for you and told him you're amazing and you miss him. And that he'd be proud of you..."

Before she could continue, his lips were on hers and he was pulling her closer to him. His tongue passed along her bottom lip and she opened her mouth to allow him to deepen the kiss. His hands found her hips and he pulled her on top of him so she was straddling him, and her hands were on either side of his face.

"Bedroom?" he asked breathlessly, breaking their kiss.

"What about slow?" she asked, pressing a kiss below his ear.

"Are you OK with everything?" he asked vaguely.

"Uh huh," she mumbled as she continued kissing his neck and shoulder.

"Then there's no need," he said with a smile, pulling her hips closer to his and finding her lips again.

She stood first and grabbed his hand, leading him up the stairs to her bedroom. He kicked the door shut behind them and she pulled his shirt over his head. His hands found the bottom of hers and did the same. He walked her backwards towards the bed and she fell beneath him with a giggle. She placed her hand on his chest as they kissed.

"Your heart's beating really fast," she said with a grin.

He stopped kissing her for a moment and just looked at her. Her curls were disheveled and her chest rose and fell as she tried to catch her breath. He was stricken at how gorgeous she was. No matter how many times he looked at her, she could still take his breath away. He ran his hands over the smooth skin of her stomach and kissed her again.

"God, I missed you," he said in a low voice.

--

He woke up and reached out for her, but she wasn't next to him. He glanced around the room before noticing her silhouette on the balcony just outside her bedroom. He took a moment to look at her. The setting sun made the sky light up and cast a golden glow around her tousled curls. She was wrapped in the white sheet they'd fallen asleep beneath with her right arm bare, clutching it to her chest. He rose from the bed and padded towards her, and she flinched slightly as he circled his arms around her.

"You scared me," she said, leaning back into his frame.

"Sorry," he said and pressed a kiss into the top of her head. "I had a flashback to Honey Grove seeing you like this."

She chuckled embarrassedly at the memory. "It's beautiful out here."

"Yeah, you are," he stated, his voice barely above a whisper.

"You use that line on all the girls?" she teased.

"There are no other girls," he stated, tightening his grip around her, then his tone got serious. "What about you? How many men have you wrapped around your finger by looking like this?"

"Lucas, I've only been with a few people, you know that." She spun around in his arms so she was facing him.

"Do I?"

"Yeah," she said, raising an eyebrow. "Nathan, Jake, you, and Evan. You on the other hand, I don't know who you've been with."

"Brooke, Nikki and you. Oh...and Lindsey," he finished sheepishly.

"Who is Lindsey?" she asked, slightly miffed.

"She uh...She's my editor."

"You slept with your editor?!" She pushed him away from her to put a few feet of space between them.

"It was one time and like, a year and a half ago." He was shaking his head, in hopes of proving to her how meaningless it had been.

"You know? I didn't expect you to be in love with me the entire time, but when you said that you were, I kind of expected that you hadn't slept with some sexy editor girl who's probably like, six feet tall and a hundred pounds and smart and gorgeous..." she rambled, pacing on the balcony and gesturing with her free arm.

"Peyton," he interrupted, placing his hands on her shoulders, "It was nothing. Her and I never dated or anything. We aren't even friends and she's engaged now!"

"You still work with her! You have to see her." She was upset and all of a sudden he felt all the guilt in the world for being the one who'd made her that way, especially since they'd just had an incredible evening.

He turned away from her and ran his hands through his hair in frustration. Turning back to her, he said, "You want to know when it happened?"

"No!!" she shouted indignantly.

"Well listen to me anyway," he insisted. "I had been in New York for meetings, and I saw this girl who looked so much like you that I couldn't focus. I mean, I chased her down the street thinking she was you. Then I was sitting in this meeting, with these publishers talking about this passage from the book they wanted to put on new promotional posters. You know what it was?" She shook her head. "It was the part about that day in the library, when I told you I wouldn't leave you. That was the first time you ever told me you loved me. I know later you said it was just because you were bleeding, but I knew there was more to it than that. And that moment, in a boardroom full of people, that's when I realized that I had let you down. Before then, I was just missing you and heartbroken. That was the moment when I realized that it was all my fault, Peyton."

"Lucas," she whispered.

"She took me out after and we had a lot to drink and...It meant nothing."

"I'm sorry," she said. "I'm a horrible person."

"No, you're not. You're the furthest thing from it." He rested his hands on her hips again, and kissed her temple, but she pulled back again.

"No! Here I am freaking out at you for having a one night stand, when I was about to marry someone else. I'm a bitch."

"You're not!" he laughed and grabbed her by the waist. His strong hands would not relent and she couldn't break his hold.

"I'm sorry," she murmured into his chest.

"Stop apologizing to me," he insisted, his hand on the back of her head.

"Why are you so good to me?" she asked, looking up at him.

"'Cause I like you a little bit," he said, kissing her smile softly. "And because you deserve it."

They stood for a while, arms tangled and leaning against the railing in front of them, and watched the colours in the sky turn to black. He sighed contently and closed his eyes to breathe her in. She was everything he wanted in the world. She represented love and family and determination. She was stronger than anyone he'd ever met. She was a pillar of hope that he would always lean on. He wanted her forever.

"Are you happy, Lucas?" she asked suddenly.

"Are you kidding?" he replied, and noting the look on her face as her eyes met his, he continued. "Of course I'm happy."

"No, I mean in general. With life and work and everything," she clarified.

"Mostly," he said. "For so long you were missing and everything seemed a little less fulfilling." She scoffed at the statement. "I'm serious. I had published a novel and was coaching, but it didn't mean as much without you."

She tried to find words to say. Anything that would express how much his admission meant to her, but she couldn't think of anything. So she just kissed him gently. "You want to go back to bed?"

"Sure, I am getting a little tired," he said, loosening his grip on her.

"You sure?" she asked coyly, walking into the room and dropping the sheet that had been covering her.

"Sleep is _so_ overrated," he said with a grin, making his way towards her.


	14. Chapter 14

Morning sun broke through the windows, tearing him from his sleep, but couldn't move him out of the bed. He wouldn't risk waking her. Listening to every muffled sound she was making, he was sure that he loved this woman. Every part of her: mind, body, soul, and spirit. He loved everything she had been, and everything she didn't know she was, and everything she hadn't become yet. He couldn't help but picture their future together. Marriage, family, waking up to children jumping into bed with them. Christmases and Halloweens. Birthdays and anniversaries. He wanted it all with her.

"Morning," she mumbled into his chest. Peyton was notoriously not a morning person.

"Hi," he replied, smoothing her hair with his hand. His arm had fallen asleep long ago with her weight resting on it, but he didn't dare complain.

"How'd you sleep?" she asked, moving slightly to nuzzle closer to him.

"Amazing," he admitted, kissing the top of her head. She felt the muscles of his chest tighten as he moved, and smiled to herself.

"Me too."

"Want breakfast?" he asked.

"Not yet." She ran her fingertips over his stomach and he let out a moan.

"You're going to kill me, Peyt," he teased. "I need to regain my strength."

"Oh come on," she whined. "Don't you want to just stay in bed all day with me?"

"That is an unfair question," he warned. He ran his fingers up and down the length of her arm.

"OK, OK," she said, moving away from him and sitting up, clutching the sheet to cover herself. She saw his eyes darken as he looked at her. "Luke, can I ask you something?" she asked. Her tone was serious.

"Anything," he replied, though he was afraid of what was about to come.

"Those pages you gave me..." She couldn't find the words to ask what she wanted to, but she didn't have to, because he spoke before she could finish.

"I meant every word," he said, his voice barely above a whisper.

She didn't know what to say. She just stared at him for a moment, looking at the face of a 22 year old man, but still seeing the 17 year old she fell in love with.

"How'd you know I'd come back?" she asked quietly.

"I didn't," he admitted. "I was so scared, Peyton." He moved closer to her and grabbed her small hand in his. "I thought I'd lost you and I just had to keep believing that you would come back. That you felt the same things I did."

"I do," she smiled and he kissed the knuckles of her left hand. A million things ran through her head as she said those two words. The two words she'd have said by now if she had only said 'yes' three years ago. Their entire future flashed before her eyes, and she wanted that future to begin as soon as possible. "Luke, do you want to get married?" Their eyes met and there was shock in his.

"Are you...you mean like, someday?" he asked, stumbling over his words.

"No. I said someday once before Lucas," she said with a smile. "Someday is now. I want to marry you. I don't want to waste any more time."

"I want to marry you too. I do," he said quickly. "But we can't just get married right now."

"Why not?" she asked seriously. "I want to be Peyton Scott. I want to wake up every morning like I did this morning. I want to have little blonde basketball playing sons. I want to be with you forever. And things always get in the way with us, and I don't want that to happen, OK? I just want forever to start now."

"You're serious," he smiled. He'd always found her rambling adorable, and this time was no exception. She'd just strung together all the things he'd wanted since he was 18.

"I'm serious, Lucas. Don't make me get down on one knee," she said with a grin.

"You can't ask me to marry you, Peyton," he declared. Her face changed to one of fear or disappointment or complete confusion. Possibly all three. "Because I should be the one asking you."

She swatted him hard on his bare chest, her mouth hanging open in shock. He grabbed her arms and pulled her on top of him as he lay back down. "You just about gave me a heart attack!" she admitted.

"You really think I'd say no to spending the rest of my life with you?" he asked, his voice deep before kissing her. "I have to go."

"What?" she said, pulling back from him and supporting herself with her hands. "Why?"

"I have to pick something up at my house. It's round and shiny and goes on your left hand," he said, rubbing his nose against hers.

"That can wait," she said, taking his lips with her own. "Trust me, Lucas. You do not want to leave this room right now." Her hand traced the outline of his jaw before he flipped them so he was on top of her.

"You know?" he whispered. "I'm convinced."

----

The two of them walked hand in hand through his bedroom door. She knew what they were there for, but was overcome by nerves. What if he changed his mind? What if he said he wanted to have a long engagement? What if he realized just how unbelievably crazy this all was?

"Stay here," he ordered, as he turned and walked towards his dresser, pulling the small black box out of his sock drawer. She remembered holding that very box in her hands all those years ago. He heard her take a sharp breath and grinned slightly as he walked back to her. He dropped to his knee before her, and took her hand in his.

"Peyton, will you..."

"Yes," she blurted out, then covered her mouth with her hand.

"You didn't even let me ask you," he laughed.

"Sorry," she said meekly. She wasn't. No matter what words he said or didn't say, her answer wasn't going to change. This was all just formality.

"Will you marry me?" he finished.

"Yes!" she said emphatically and he stood and wrapped his arms around her for the hundredth time that day. Pulling away, he opened the box to reveal the ring she'd only seen once before, on his mother's finger. "Lucas..." she whispered, having forgotten how beautiful it was. He slid the ring onto her finger, and was surprised to find it was a perfect fit.

"I love you," he whispered, pulling her towards him again.

"I love you, too," she replied. She kissed him again, and put into it everything she was feeling.

"So who do you want to tell first?" he asked, running his thumb over the ring he'd just put on her hand.

"Your mom," she said with a smile, meeting his eyes. He just smiled and shook his head in response. He loved her for thinking of his family first.

She sat on the bed while he dialed the phone, waiting for his mom to answer. Looking at the ring, she thought of everything it represented both for her and Lucas and Keith and Karen.

"Hey, mom...yeah, I miss you too. How's Lily?...Aww. Well, tell her I miss her too. So listen, I have some news," he said, looking to Peyton, who was smiling at him. His back was to the door and he didn't hear it open or see Haley walk in. "I asked Peyton to marry me. We're engaged!" he said.

Haley's eyes had been fixed on Peyton's the entire time, and now a huge smile was on her face and her eyes were wide.

"Shut up!" she shouted, causing Lucas to spin around.

"Yeah, that's Haley," he explained into the phone. "I know mom, I'll give you the details later... No, the ring fit perfectly."

Haley reached for Peyton's hand, and tears filled her eyes as she recognized the setting immediately, and she pulled her friend into a tight hug.

"OK, I'll tell her. Love you too," he said, before hanging up the phone.

"So much for slow!" Haley exclaimed, grabbing Lucas and hugging him. "Congratulations!!"

"Thanks, Hales," he said, a smile on his face bigger than she'd seen in ages. "Mom says congratulations to you, too," he said, turning to Peyton and putting his arm around her waist.

"Wait till Nathan finds out!" Haley shouted. "I'm sorry. I have to calm down!"

Lucas and Peyton laughed at their frantic friend as she asked for all the details of how everything had happened. They explained the whole thing to her, and Lucas took a bit of playful ribbing when Haley found out that he'd been proposed to. Peyton kissed his cheek as he shook his head. She explained that he still got on one knee and asked the question, so that was what they'd say was the actual proposal.

Haley started to tear up again and Lucas grabbed her into a hug. "What?" he asked.

She pulled away and moved to hug Peyton again. "I can't believe we're going to be sisters-in-law!" she said excitedly.

"Where's Nathan?" Peyton asked with a laugh.

"Oh God! He's waiting for me to get home so he can go to the gym," Haley said with a laugh. "You have to come over and tell him. I'll call Brooke to meet us there!"

"OK, Hales, you really do need to calm down." Lucas laughed as she hurried out of the room and began towards her car. Peyton went to follow her, but his hand caught her elbow and pulled her back to him, their bodies crashing together clumsily. She smiled up at him, and noticed the tear pooling in his eye.

"Peyton, I..." he started, trying to regain his composure.

"Lucas," she whispered. She watched as the tear fell and gently wiped it away with the back of her index finger.

"Thank you," he said, looking into her eyes intensely.

"For what?" she asked as she rested her hand on his cheek.

"Nothing. Everything. More than everything," he admitted softly. She kissed him delicately on the side of his mouth and took his hand in hers, leading him towards the door.

He'd never felt more content, more at peace, than he did with her hand in his, knowing that he had her to himself for the rest of their lives. They were together now. And nothing in the world was going to come between them again. He wouldn't let it if it tried.

---

All their friends met at Nathan and Haley's, completely oblivious as to why they were being summoned. Once the news broke, the evening turned into an impromptu engagement party, complete with champagne and the bridal magazines Brooke ran out to get. The women flipped through the pages while the men laughed and clinked their beer bottles together.

"She looks happy," Nathan mused, watching the blonde throw her head back at something Brooke had said.

"Yeah, she does," Lucas agreed, unable to hide his smile. "She deserves it."

"So do you, big brother." Nathan clapped Lucas on the back and smiled as he watched him gaze longingly at the woman he'd always been in love with.

They returned to the group of of men who were in a heated discussion over which NBA player deserved that year's MVP honours, but Lucas' eyes would constantly travel back to Peyton, which didn't go unnoticed by his friends.

The night was coming to a close and the only people left were Nathan and Haley, Lucas, Peyton, Mouth and Brooke. The six of them sat in the living room chatting idly until Mouth announced he and Brooke had best be going. They said their goodbyes and the three Scotts and one soon-to-be Scott were left alone. Nathan and Haley walked towards the kitchen to tidy up, and Peyton began to follow but felt Lucas' arm snake around her waist from behind. His breath was hot on the back of her neck as he planted a kiss there, sweeping her hair out of the way with his free hand.

"I'm going to love you forever," he whispered.

"You better," she said with a laugh, turning in his arms so their bodies were flush to one another.

"I don't think you know how much I love you," he said seriously, shaking his head subtly and breaking eye contact.

"Promise me something," she requested.

"Anything," he said with a smile.

"Promise me you'll tell me every day," she said shyly. She felt strange asking him to do it, but knew that's what she wanted.

"I promise I'll tell you any chance I get." He grinned and kissed her softly.

This was what she'd wanted. All along, she'd been searching for what she'd found when she was 17. And there was no way she was ever going to let him even think of leaving her again.


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N: **Here it is - the last chapter. Enjoy!

**----**

Nathan and the boys grumbled as they helped Lucas move his things into Peyton's house - their house - but they were all inwardly thrilled that the two were together. Brooke and Haley helped with wedding plans and details while Peyton was trying to get her record label up and running. Lucas' mother was happy to let her soon-to-be daughter in law use the empty space adjacent to Tric as her new office space, and Peyton had already found her first act. Everything was going smoothly. Lucas finished his novel and it was in the early stages of editing. Without her requesting, he'd asked his publishing company for a different editor to put Peyton's mind at ease. He'd do anything for her, and it was the least he could do to make her happy.

They were married two months later in a small ceremony in the same chapel where her parents wed. They exchanged simple vows and she wore a simple dress and everything was...simple. They figured that over the years, they'd had enough of complicated. They didn't want an extravagant affair - much to Brooke's dismay - they just wanted to get on with their lives. Together.

She took his last name. She couldn't see herself being his wife without taking the last name Scott. She'd made the decision on her own without him asking if she planned to, and the smile on his face when she told him was well worth it.

----

_Four Years Later..._

"Baby, come on! We've gotta go," he shouted from the bottom of the stairs. He looked at his watch again and waited for a response that never came. "Peyton!"

"I'm coming! One minute," she yelled back from their bedroom.

"We can't be late, or we'll feel the wrath of Brooke Davis," he called back. "You've been up there forever!"

He had gotten ready in five minutes. Put on the suit, splash of cologne, and he was ready. She, on the other hand, had been in their bedroom for an hour and 20 minutes and had yet to emerge.

He moved to the couch in their living room and resisted the urge to turn on the basketball game he knew he was missing. He tilted his head back and sighed at his wife's tardiness. He was sure they were going to be late, and really didn't want to miss even a moment of Nathan and Haley's 10 year anniversary party. Brooke had been in charge of planning everything, and had left them with strict orders to be on time.

"Lucas," she said softly, standing in the doorway to the room he was in.

He turned his head to look at her and it was all he could do to keep his jaw off the floor. She was in a red strapless dress, much like she'd worn to the couple of honour's second wedding, though this was a deeper shade and had a sweetheart neckline. Her curls were swept into a loose updo and her makeup was flawless. He couldn't help but look her up and down as he stood from the couch.

"Peyton, you look..." he started, but he couldn't find the right word. He walked towards her and placed one hand on her hip and one on her face and kissed her gently.

"Lucas Scott, lost for words?" she teased, playing with the hair at the nape of his neck and he just looked into her eyes. "Come on, we have to go."

"We could probably be a few minutes late," he said, his voice full of lust.

"No, we can't. Remember? The wrath of Brooke Davis?" she said playfully. "Come on." She took his hand in hers and pulled him towards the door. Every time he looked at her like he just had, she felt like she had when she was a teenager and they were stealing kisses from one another. They'd been married for four years and he still gave her that look at least once a day. And he had no clue what it did to her.

Once in the car, he placed his hand on her thigh as they drove the distance to the hotel where the party was being held.

"I don't know why they are having this party in the first place. They've already had two weddings. They really need another celebration?" Lucas lamented, pulling into the hotel parking lot.

"Well," she started, leaning over and placing her hand on his chest, playing with his tie, "If they weren't having this party, then we wouldn't be out tonight, and I wouldn't be wearing this dress, and you wouldn't get to take me home after a couple of glasses of wine and get me _out_ of this dress."

He took a deep breath as he turned off the engine. "Well then let's go to this damn party."

They each got out of the car and their hands joined as they walked towards the entrance.

"Men are so easy," she stated. "Put on a pretty dress and make a couple innuendos, and they're eating out of the palm of your hand."

"Yeah, Yeah," he said. "But when you look like that, you could suggest anything and I'll probably be game for it."

"Hmm...maybe I'll keep that in mind," she said, leaning up to kiss him as they walked through the doors into the party.

Most of their friends were already in the room, which was decorated with tasteful purple and red flowers. Brooke was buzzing around, greeting everyone and making sure everyone had full glasses. She was in a simple blue silk dress and her hair was swept off her back. She noticed her friends enter the room and immediately rushed over to meet them.

"Peyton! You look amazing!" she said, hugging the blonde. "Lucas, you look...like a guy in a suit."

"Thank you, Brooke," he said with a grin. "You look nice, too."

"I'll let you two go and talk to the happy couple," she said, nodding to Nathan and Haley who were talking to Deb and Karen.

They made their way to where Nathan and Haley were standing, Lucas' hand on the small of Peyton's back, guiding her through the crowd. After congratulating the couple and greeting his mother, Deb passed Nathan and Haley's two year old son, Benjamin, to his uncle.

"Hey buddy," Lucas said, kissing the child's forehead.

Peyton watched as the two interacted, and her heart filled with love for her husband and his way with children. They always seemed to flock to him, and seeing him now with the dark haired, blue eyed little boy only made her love him more. He handed the child to his father and Peyton and Lucas walked away to continue greeting the other guests.

"Ben is so like Nathan it's crazy," Lucas mused as they made their way towards the bar.

"I know," Peyton said, looking back towards the little boy. "Poor Haley," she joked.

The two laughed as they waited to be served, both of them not taking their eyes off the little boy they'd just been talking about.

"I want one," he finally said, turning his head to meet her eyes. She was smiling.

"OK, well let's wait till no one's looking and grab him," she jested, nodding her head in the direction of their nephew.

He chuckled at his wife's sense of humour. "I'm serious, Peyt."

"How do you know I'm not?" she asked, kinking an eyebrow. He tilted his head and shot her a look. "You really want to have a baby?"

He just looked at her with a grin on his face and nodded slowly, his eyes never leaving hers. He was afraid of what her reaction would be, and inwardly kicked himself for bringing up the topic in a roomful of people.

"OK," she said, placing her hand on his cheek. "Let's do it."

He was shocked. There was no argument. There was no list of reasons why it was a bad time. There was no fear in her voice. She leaned in to kiss him sweetly on the lips and he wrapped his arms around her and hugged her tightly.

"I love you," he whispered into her hair.

"You've said that a few times today," she said, taking his hand in hers.

"That won't be the last, either." He smiled at her and she leaned up to peck him on the cheek. "So how long do you think we have to stay?" he asked.

"Lucas, we just got here!" she objected.

"Yeah." He leaned down to speak softly into her ear. "But I can't wait to get you home and get you out of that dress."

Her face reddened and he laughed at the effect he had on her, bringing her hand to his lips and placing a kiss on her wedding band.

"I love you, too, Lucas," she said with a smile.

----

So that's it! The grand finale. I hope you guys enjoyed it! Let me know what you think. Also, feel free (rather, feel encouraged) to check out my new story, _Life as a Photograph_.


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